You Park Like a C***

I should add that you’ll find me as ‘therealyplac’ on BlueSky (someone’s already pinched the YPLAC account name).

A rare and brief hello. Saw this sh1tstain failing to get into a large accessible space at Sainsbury’s earlier. If you need to ask “was there a blue badge”, you don’t know me well enough. Of course not. #yplac

@jconnollybooks Picked up ARRWB from my local Waterstones today. Very excited. However, looks like someone has graffitied it with their name. “Colin Carling”, I hope you’re proud of yourself. Think I’ve still got the receipt.

Everyone playing nice over here? Been a while. *looks around* Crikey, what a mess.

Is this Horsham’s hardest space to park in correctly?? Experts and useless drivers agree!

@huwstephens Any band that wants Neil Hamburger to open up for them is fine by me! Big up Search Results.

Look, we're amazed that it's a BMW too.

Hivemind, I need your help once more. Can anyone recommend a fun thing to visit/do just off the M6 (north of Stafford, south of Lancaster). Thinking quirky local attractions as opposed to big famous things.

Busy garden centre car park on Good Friday? No worries. I’ll plant it over two spaces. #badparking #porschecunt #yplac

Good that my timeline is bursting with bullshit scam promo adverts. This site really is absolute 🐕 💩.

Saw this the other day. No blue badge. Just sat there.

A big f*ck you from this cnut in Sainsbury’s Horsham yesterday.

Have you seen how many followers we have? It’s a big deal.

Blimey. Where are all these shop orders coming from? I sometimes go weeks without anything, and then something happens that triggers a minor tsunami of the buggers. If you’ve recently ordered something, do drop me a line telling me what inspired the purchase. Genuinely interested

Look, come on folks, let’s ditch this utter shit tip for good. It’s not beneficial for our mental health. And look at my posts that you’re missing over on that blue place. bsky.app/profile/therealypla…

@JeansAndSheux hope this link finds you well. I can only imagine what’s going on in the trouser/footwear department on the other side of the bar. Dear lord. instagram.com/p/DFP6kKSMoC3/

Anyone else get tweets that you made years ago that seem to work as magnets for bots? This random reply of mine gets liked all the time by dodgy fishing accounts.

Bristol earlier this month. And we know they’d park like this regardless of how empty the car park is.

Folks, I need help with another earworm that I can't identify. Clues, it was playing on XFM in 1998-99. I thought it might be Belle & Sebastian or Kings of Convenience, but now not so sure. Chorus goes like this: voca.ro/1lTreBn4X9uZ. Would love to listen to it again!

Worth a retweet as this stupid dump of a site thought that by tagging someone in a tweet automatically makes it a reply. Reminder that we're over on Bluesky as therealyplac if you're interested.