Goodmorning!

hey i’m back on twitter i figured out my login

Stop piercing your babies ears!! Give em a throat tat instead, that's way cooler

im fragile but not like flowers or glass, more like a cigarette in your pocket

bless me @shakepay 🙏🙏 (account: @666jared)

Well dye my hair blue & call me Marge Simpson cause I love you homie

i would do absolutely anything for my friends except answer their text messages

There’s a 3 bedroom, 2 bath pothole in the Walmart parking lot if anyone is looking

every cart at walmart needs a front end alignment and a tire rotation

I am the naked window neighbor

one minute I was teenager and the next minute I was a 27 year old senior citizen

if @KylePollettttt reply’s to this ill get another beer at this bar

“i was born in 2007” sounds so fake bro nobody born that late

One time in a couple years ago I zoned out and I don't think I've ever zoned back in

stop wearing Harley Davidson shirts if you don’t listen to his music

nowhere to go & forever to get there

it’s always "how was work" but never "quit and i'll take care of you"

28th birthday well spent ✅

sure my tattoos will look stupid when i get old but have you ever considered that they look stupid now too

why do people named Thomas go by tom and not ass