Highlighting the bizarre and terrifying comments found in the Mail comment section. Parody.

Joined August 2012
Daily Mail Comments retweeted
Piers Morgan's origin story, Haha 😂 😂 😂. OMG these videos are amazing hahaha 🤣 whole world is making fun of him calling him out lol
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Replying to @piersmorgan
Piers Morgan Writes a Song for Meghan Markle
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Daily Mail Comments retweeted
Replying to @piersmorgan
You spent over half a decade yelling that Meghan was a monster for staying away from her father. Now that the horrific details have dropped, your panic strategy is literally “Why didn't she tell me I was wrong while I was busy screaming at her?"
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Daily Mail Comments retweeted
How long did he know 🤔
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Daily Mail Comments retweeted
I mean. Out of everyone. Dan Wootton would know a PR disaster … 👀
In December 2025, with Thomas Markle Sr recovering from a leg amputation in a hospital in the Philippines, Dan Wootton posted on X under the banner “BREAKING RIGHT NOW” that Markle’s family had told him there had been no contact between Meghan and her father since the operation. He quoted an anonymous source close to Thomas saying her PR were “full of shit”, and ended with a verdict of his own: “Another PR disaster for the nastiest Duchess in history.” The post has been viewed more than 840,000 times. Critical commentary on Meghan (and Harry) is extremely lucrative and there is a large audience hungry to hear any criticism of the couple. A cursory glance at the output of Murdoch’s TalkTV or Marshall’s GB News confirms it. Her spokesperson had said the day before that the Duchess had reached out to her father, so the source’s jibe was plainly aimed at a statement already on the record. Thomas Markle said he was confused by the reports and had received nothing, and on that narrow point the family’s account may well have been accurate: according to People, she had emailed him, and those around him said he did not use email. Five days later the spokesperson said a Daily Mail reporter stationed at his bedside had made private contact difficult, and confirmed that a letter from her was now in his hands. The suggestion that her PR were lying and “full of shit” did not stand up, and Wootton’s verdict rested on the assumption that she had not tried. He presented that assumption as settled when it was, at the very least, disputed. Ten months later the story has turned. On Thursday The Sun published claims by Thomas Markle Jr that he had found child sexual abuse images among his father’s belongings at his former home in Cebu. Thomas Markle Sr denies the allegations, calling them “sick lies”. Philippine authorities are reported to be looking into them. No charges have been brought and nothing has been proven. Wootton’s response was revealing. He called The Sun’s exclusive horrifying and potentially very significant, then added: “However, there are two sides to all stories and I believe the other side is worth reporting because The Sun hasn’t included it.” That other side, attributed to people close to Thomas Sr, suggested his son was driven by revenge after the “money tap was turned off”. Samantha Markle appeared on Wootton’s show the same day to stand by their father. Reporting a denial is responsible journalism. Thomas Markle Sr is entitled to have his side heard, as is anyone facing allegations of this gravity, and his son’s motives are a fair question. What deserves scrutiny is when Wootton finds this principle and when he mislays it. Here is what we now know. On Friday Meghan said a letter containing “troubling and disturbing allegations” against her father had been shared with her several years ago, that she had been given assurances they were being investigated, and that her decision not to allow him contact with her children had been made “to protect them”. On Saturday the Metropolitan Police confirmed that in January 2019 it received a letter containing “a number of claims about alleged offending outside the United Kingdom”, sent to its Protection Command over concerns for the Duchess’s security. The Met passed it to the Sussexes’ office “for their awareness” and did not share the details with other law enforcement agencies. It is now reviewing its handling and considering whether to refer itself to the Independent Office for Police Conduct. Accuracy matters here, so the limits need stating plainly. The Met’s statement does not say the claims were ever investigated, which sits uneasily with the assurance Meghan says she received. Her statement dated the letter to 2018; her spokesperson has since accepted the Met’s date, attributing the slip to recalling events from seven years ago without a diary. And the estrangement itself came first. The relationship broke down in the run-up to the May 2018 wedding, and her handwritten letter to her father that August asked him to stop talking to the tabloids. Even the source close to Meghan quoted in The Sun’s original story dated her break with her father to 2018. A letter received by the police in January 2019 cannot explain how the rift began, so her claim that any distance had “one reason” goes further than the public record supports. What the letter can explain is why the distance held from 2019 onwards, and why a grandfather never met two grandchildren born after it. Archie arrived in May 2019, Lilibet in 2021. Those were precisely the choices that drew the harshest commentary, and the commentators did not know what she knew. Wootton’s defenders will say he could not have known. That is true, and a fair critique should concede it. Almost nobody outside a small circle knew. What he can be held to is his certainty. Without knowing what lay behind her decisions, he delivered a judgement on her character, sourced to one side of a divided family. When her spokesperson said she had reached out, he suggested she had put the story about to steal attention from the Princess of Wales. Teun van Dijk’s ideological square is once again useful for seeing the pattern. Discourse that divides the world into Us and Them tends to emphasise Our good qualities and Their bad ones, while playing down Our bad qualities and Their good ones. For years Meghan sat firmly in Their column. Her conduct was personalised and moralised (“the nastiest Duchess in history”), her father’s camp was treated as a reliable source, and her spokesperson’s statements were read as spin. When allegations landed on the other side of the square, the register changed. Suddenly there were two sides, the accuser’s motives were in question, and caution was the order of the day. Both modes have a place in journalism. Scepticism towards a family source is as legitimate as scepticism towards an accuser. The selectivity is what gives the game away: balance arrives when it protects Us and goes missing when it might help Them. Expect the same pattern with the date discrepancy, which is already being presented by Meghan’s critics as proof of dishonesty. A gap of a few months in recalling a letter from seven years ago is the kind of error anyone might make, and she has accepted the police record. It changes nothing about the central fact the Met has now confirmed: a letter with serious claims about her father reached her office in early 2019, and the police did not share its details with any other law enforcement agency. None of this establishes that the allegations are true. That is a matter for the investigators now examining them, and Thomas Markle Sr is entitled to the presumption of innocence. What it does establish is that the story told for years, of a cold daughter abandoning a frail father, was told with great confidence and relayed to millions by people who did not have the facts. Two sides to every story is a sound principle. It would have been worth applying in December. theguardian.com/uk-news/2026…
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Daily Mail Comments retweeted
What exactly did Megan do to Piers Morgan that makes him still so obsessed? it's really unsettling. How quickly he can jump attacking her instead of the actual abuser. I always find the questioning of anyone but the perpetrator... questionable.
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Daily Mail Comments retweeted
😳 WOW. SNL UK REALLY WENT THERE last night on the Royal Family and the Thomas Markle allegations. They said something you’d never expect to hear on a mainstream comedy show: “If the allegations about Meghan Markle’s father are true and he is a paedophile, there is a genuine chance Meghan could be considered Royal.” Brutal! 😂 Fair play to them. I thought SNL UK would be the usual bland, cautious, box-ticking, unfunny stuff, but it’s actually pretty good. Definitely didn’t expect to see that. 👏
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Daily Mail Comments retweeted
I think Meghan should seriously consider getting a restraining order against Piers. If this is what has fuelled his fixation on her all these years, then his obsession is far more disturbing than I ever imagined.
Replying to @RealLifeGold
Here's your answer, straight from the horses mouth.
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Daily Mail Comments retweeted
He had a thing for her, and @piersmorgan seems to be handling rejection so bad. Its way past an obsession now.
I have never understood why Piers is so weird about Meghan
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Daily Mail Comments retweeted
Men blaming women on problems caused by men sustains the patriarchy - and while there’s a lot of it going around this is a very obvious example
Inexplicable. And did Meghan Markle make any further enquiries to the police about her father’s alleged crimes and any investigation into them? If not, why not? Why did none of them do anything if the claims were so serious? Why didn’t they seek to protect others?
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Daily Mail Comments retweeted
Piers Morgan is back on his on insane Meghan fixation The tweets today alone - Jesus H Christ Obsessive beyond belief
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Daily Mail Comments retweeted
The year she married Prince Harry. So the British police and the Royal family were aware of this, since the Royal protection was informed. Meghan took a decision to cut her father completely even though she has been bullied nonstop all these years by the British press. I'm so proud of her.
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A lot of people are going to start deleting their old tweets supporting Thomas Markle in the next few days, especially those who’ve profited from exploiting the rift between Meghan and her father, using him to paint her as a cruel mother deliberately keeping her children away from their innocent, aging grandfather. Take screenshots. Hold them accountable.
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Wonder how @piersmorgan is feeling today?
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Daily Mail Comments retweeted
Hey @piersmorgan, in 2018 you called Thomas Markle a “shy, decent man” and a “thoroughly honourable” father. That was after he staged paparazzi photos for cash days before the wedding, then spent years doing paid interviews attacking his daughter. His own son has now reportedly handed police “hundreds, if not thousands” of alleged child abuse images found in his home. Still standing by “decent”? Or was that always just useful for your grudge?
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I wonder who was Mirror editor for much of this period @piersmorgan?
When Paul Gascoigne started seeing private conversations and details of his life appearing in the newspapers, he became convinced somebody close to him was selling stories about him. The problem was that some of the things being printed had only been discussed on the phone with people he trusted. Gascoigne knew something was wrong. But nobody believed him. “I knew my phone was getting hacked. I knew 110%.” The more Gascoigne tried to explain what he thought was happening, the more paranoid he appeared. Even his therapist told him that was what it was. Gascoigne was adamant. “There’s f*** all wrong with me. I know I’m getting hacked.” He remembered having six phones at once and still using the public phone box outside because he no longer trusted any of them. He even flew to Spain simply to buy another phone in the hope nobody would know the number. Stories continued appearing. Gascoigne started looking at the people closest to him. “The only people I spoke to were my mum and dad, and it kept coming out in the newspapers.” So he decided it must be them. “I was thinking, ‘Mum and dad, what the f*** are you doing?’” “Why are you speaking to the papers?” He stopped speaking to them. At different points he also suspected friends and other members of his family, because he could not understand how journalists seemed to know conversations that had taken place in private. Gascoigne later said the fallout with his parents lasted for months. “That destroyed us.” He spent tens of thousands of pounds in surveillance shops buying equipment designed to find hidden cameras and listening devices. When he went into treatment, he struggled to speak openly in group sessions because he feared other patients might be passing information to journalists. For two years, he stopped speaking to some members of his own family because he believed they were betraying him. Gascoigne said Saturday nights became particularly bad because he would sit wondering what might appear in the Sunday papers. “I couldn’t wait for that to end.” For years, Gascoigne had been told that what he believed was happening to his phone was part of his paranoia. Eventually, the truth started coming out. Mirror Group Newspapers later admitted that 18 articles about Gascoigne had resulted from illegal activity, and the High Court heard that his phone had been targeted over a period stretching from 2000 to 2010. In 2015, Gascoigne finally went to court. He had waited years for the chance to sit opposite the people he believed had helped turn his life into something he could no longer trust. He told the court that he had been too frightened to speak freely to his parents, his children or almost anyone else. “It was just horrendous.” Then the lawyers representing Mirror Group Newspapers announced that they were not going to cross-examine him. Gascoigne could barely believe it. “I’ve waited 15 years to be sat here.” “I’m disgusted really. Fifteen years.” Gascoigne had spent years changing phones, buying surveillance equipment, accusing his own family and being told that what he believed was happening was in his head. Before leaving the witness box, he asked to say one final thing. “I’d like to trade my mobile in for a coffin because these guys have ruined my life.” Two months later, the judgment came. The court ruled that phone hacking at the Mirror titles had been “widespread and frequent” and awarded Gascoigne £188,250 in damages. For years, people around him had treated his fears as paranoia. But the court found that Mirror Group Newspapers had been hacking his phone. Gascoigne had been right about it all along. #football
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Daily Mail Comments retweeted
What an absolute phoney you are 🤯
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Daily Mail Comments retweeted
Rat Piers Morgan before Messi rejected his interview request. 😭
What an absolute phoney you are 🤯
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