I am your father's brother's nephew's cousin's former roommate....so I have that going for me, which is nice 😏 #PearlJam #BeHereForIt #Blackhawks #DaBears
Florida, USA
Joined June 2015
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I was petting a dog and the owner said "Do you wanna see her puppy in the car?"
And I'm like "fuck yeah I do!!!"
So we walked to her car and OMG the puppy was so cute. Then I thought to myself Damn...did I really just follow a stranger to her car cuz she she had a puppy 🤔🤣
I hate showing people my phone.
I am naked as fuck in there and there are some questionable screenshots.
One wrong swipe and this could change a friendship forever.
It's finally Spooky Season....time to act exactly the same way I have all year except wearing a hoodie ✌️
Somewhere along the way I must have become a motivational speaker because after a weeks of talking with someone, they decide to start focusing on themselves
The look my waitress at Applebee's gives me when she sees me adding more credits to my Touchtunes account after blasting Divorced Dad Rock all happy hour while bringing me my 4th Dracula's Juice
I carry wet naps with me instead of condoms because the odds of me finding delicious chicken wings are better than me getting laid these days.....
I am the most burnt out I have ever been in my life but you will never see me give up and quit. I have too many fuckers to prove wrong.
RANDOM FRIDAY THOUGHT
I am convinced that most of Gen X watched a movie when we were way too young to watch it and this is why we are the way we are.
Mine was Porky's.
What was yours?
I don't care if you are black, white, Asian, straight, gay, bi-sexual, Trans, tall, short, skinny, fat, rich, poor, famous, infamous.....if you are cool to me, I will be cool to you 😎✌️