Jerah

Writing essays is fun and rewarding. Guess what's not fun and rewarding? Playing League of Legends. Guess what I'm doing right now. Writing an essay because I'm not some League addicted freak. Guess what I will be doing in two hours. Playing League of Legends.

As an almost owner of a bachelors, I read somewhere that I need to have my heart broken by a man who works in a warehouse. It's part of the job description, I think.

Here's an update on my parent's divorce. My dad at Christmas: praying for my mom in the hospital and giving his family updates every few minutes. My dad to her after she's out: "Your totally unnecessary ambulance ride to the hospital cost 1400 dollars."

My whole life I've gotten in trouble for listening to good music.

*Me, trying to enjoy my break* Coworker: *calls her mom to vent about her dad getting engaged while he's still married to her mom and posting the engagement on Facebook. Me: 👀

Tonally, playing cards with my family is confusing

I hope Cache, Oklahoma gets hit by the Chinese space rocket. Get rid of this blight on the countryside.

Last month, my dad made more money in a month than I've made my entire life.

For perspective, my father could pay off my entire student debt with one month of work. Not sure what the perspective is, but I'm just putting that out there.

I burned the roof of my mouth on a poptart and there's only one betrayal worse than that. Period.

So my brother got my mom a very thoughtful mother's day gift and when she asked me in the family group chat if I helped pick it out, I said yes thinking someone would call me out and it would be funny. I was mistaken. No one has pointed that out yet. Idk what to do now.

I wanna start swimming for exercise but like where do I even start? The pool? Idk.

Everyone hates a 9 to 5 but have you tried working an unreliable and inconsistent job in the retail or the food industry? Will your paycheck be 250 or 800? Depends how understaffed we are.