5 one-liners in under a minute!

They say comparison is the thief of joy, but the police are pretty sure the guy who kidnapped my Auntie Joy is actually called Keith.

A joke I whipped up earlier 🍦

I tried to become a magician, but it was very tricky. 🎩

I don't see the problem 🤷

I once swallowed a dictionary. It gave me thesaurus throat I've ever had.

A joke about my new job 👷

Joke of the day 🦜

My local pet shop just started selling clothes. I asked for a small jumper, and they sold me a grasshopper.

This joke is particularly stupid.

A one-liner 📅

This isn't my only joke about a sofa. I've got another one I've been sitting on for a while.

I've got another joke like this one, but it didn't make the cut.

A joke about going to therapy... He really went all out. Incidentally, when I was a therapist, a contortionist came to see me. I said, "So, how are you in yourself?"

Joke of the day 🛣️ One of the earliest supporters of my career was the inventor of the satnav. He was always routing for me, and without him, I wouldn't be where I am today.

Joke of the day 🌎 I tried to write another joke about space, but the amount of research was astronomical.

Joke of the day 📖

Joke of the day 🍲

The chicken that swallowed a bag of makeup didn't invent cosmetics, but she certainly laid the foundation.

I used to date a marionette, but she said I was too controlling.