@Fiveankles

Former Professional Football Player Turned Current Pundit.

youtube.com/@TheExplodingHeads
Joined January 2015
  • Tweets3.7K
  • Following115
  • Followers8.4K
243Media
I had quite the pubic thatch back in the day.
The Exploding Heads@Exploding_HeadsOct 20
The foreign players changed the pubic hair game overnight
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Man City have been found guilty of 114 charges. Nobody talking about the clean sheet they kept on Charge 115. Typical negativity from pundits but you won’t get that from me.
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"Game Management" - I get to the heart of what it actually means.
The Exploding Heads@Exploding_HeadsAug 25
"if anything, he's managed the game too well..."
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Training ground bantz:
The Exploding Heads@Exploding_HeadsJul 28
Hilarious training ground pranks, masterfully retold by Ian Fiveankles.
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In football, time can be emotionally manipulated.
The Exploding Heads@Exploding_HeadsJul 22
They simply wanted it more
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America should never be allowed anywhere near football. Ever. #Half_Time_Show
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This “closing ceremony” is exactly what we need. Nothing says class and footballing purity like Robbie Williams and Nicole Scherzinger singing about knees. And Tom Cruise’s act-ing has just taken me to footballing heaven. Oh and I WANT / NEED that Luis Vuitton special cupboard
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Going 4-0 up is clearly the worst thing for England to have done. Yet another huge tactical error from Tuchel to have been so dominant for 45 minutes.
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It’s obvious from this first half display that Kane and Bellingham were holding us back.
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Looking forward to defending this for 87 minutes. #Bronze_Final #worldcup
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You cannot go through life defending a one goal advantage. #England #WorldCup
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My thoughts on semi-finals #FrancevSpain #EnglandvArgentina #WorldCup2026
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Listen to Danny Murphy cream his pants over this Norway chance.
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The lottery of penalties is a lottery.
The Exploding Heads@Exploding_HeadsJun 30
The lottery of penalties
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"You can't fit a square peg in a round hole"
The Exploding Heads@Exploding_HeadsJun 24
Pundits when a player is a square peg in a round hole.
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I am very glad of the countdown-to-kick offs, don't know where I'd be without them, so thanks America. But are there too many adverts? #WorldCup2026
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Baden Baden back in 2006
The Exploding Heads@Exploding_HeadsJun 15
"Theo Walcott's mum chucked a table." The nightmare of Baden Baden in 2006 when the WAGs were out of control.
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Everything you can expect from the World Cup Opening Ceremony
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Music from #Uppbeat (free for Creators!):uppbeat.io/t/benjamin-botkin… code: JVYDUZB9GVWKNVC5
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