Retro football writing from Football Bloody Hell. Long reads, classic matches and forgotten heroes, with new stories every week. ⚽📼
Football's past
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Thirty years of Wednesday fans blaming Steve Bould for that tackle. David Hirst has a different culprit:
"It's not Steve Bould I have a problem with, it's Nigel Worthington. He passed me the ball."
The best line in this morning's Sliding Doors piece.
November 1992. Ferguson wanted a centre-forward, and his first choice was David Hirst. Trevor Francis wouldn't take his calls, so United sent a fax. Weeks later they bought Cantona instead.
Sliding Doors, on Football Bloody Hell:
footballbh.net/2026/10/29/da…
November 1992. Ferguson wanted a centre-forward, and his first choice was David Hirst. Trevor Francis wouldn't take his calls, so United sent a fax. Weeks later they bought Cantona instead.
Sliding Doors, on Football Bloody Hell:
footballbh.net/2026/10/29/da…
The Steve Bould tackle at Highbury that broke his ankle? Hirst blames somebody else entirely. "It's not Steve Bould I have a problem with, it's Nigel Worthington. He passed me the ball."
Terry's memory of his debut is gloriously unromantic: "There's not much you can mess up in five minutes so I just went on, didn't think anything of it. Wisey got sent off after about 20 seconds of me being on the pitch and that was my debut over really."
As an apprentice, Terry ran Vialli's baths. "He used to like it really hot with a little bit of bubbles, so he could get in with his boots on and they would mould around his feet." The Diadoras, naturally.
On 28 October 1998, 28 years ago tonight, Gianluca Vialli scored a hat-trick against league leaders Aston Villa, then sent on the 17-year-old apprentice who ran his baths. His name was John Terry.
footballbh.net/2026/10/28/vi…
Chelsea 4 Aston Villa 1, League Cup third round. Chelsea were missing eight of the side that had drawn at Leeds the Sunday before; Villa, top of the Premiership, made six changes. One report that night called it "a run-out for both clubs' squad players". It was.
Before FM, there was Champ Man 99/00 and a Mansfield save I couldn't stop thinking about. So I wrote it up as a comic diary novel: Johnny Cooper – Championship Manager.
Kindle, £1.99 until 31 October, then £2.99: amazon.co.uk/dp/B00N9Z74SY
Paperback: amazon.co.uk/dp/1501040448
"London Road smells of onions and overconfidence."
Peterborough away, after half a week of Barry Fry on the blower haggling over one of my players. Some lines write themselves when the game hands you Barry Fry.
"The lads turn up in sombreros because they’ve heard I’m scouring South America."
Every save has the moment you go all in on one country's bargain bin. Johnny's was South America, hoping someone would take £500 a week. #CM9900
"Stace reckoned it was the best night of football nobody came to see."
Golden goal, a few hundred in the ground, their keeper having the game of his life. If you ever played a cup tie in front of nobody on Champ Man, you'll know the feeling.
My book, Johnny Cooper – Championship Manager (written as Chris Darwen): a made-up Mansfield season, dictated by Championship Manager.
Revised and expanded, on Kindle at £1.99 until 31 October, then £2.99.
amazon.co.uk/dp/B00N9Z74SY
Back in 2014 I wrote the diary of a Mansfield Town season that never happened: Johnny Cooper, a made-up manager, doing exactly what Championship Manager told him. It's now out as a revised and expanded 2026 edition. The save you wish you'd written down.
