SXG

Best thing I ever did for my life/mental was start meditating. The benefits are crazy and scientifically proved. Esp for people who struggle with their minds (Depression, Anxiety, body dysmorphia etc). Mums do it for 2 weeks and see if you don't see a difference

This is why I limit my time on that app. Have me BRICKED up at my desk

Is all my money worthless now?

Me waiting for the teams notification saying “Out of respect we will be closing our offices tomo…”

And ppl think MI6 aren’t sitting there collecting tweets on you man keke’ing about Liz! The get back will be expeditious

Jokes aside. Tell me this isn’t fuckin hard!

Just did a “abs in 6 minutes” workout. It’s been half an hour, did I do it wrong?

I’m turning up to work In a Union Jack flag with a box of tissues so I get sent home

It still does

Most popular google search this week: “230mm to inches”

I turn my insta notifications off so they’re a surprise :) Does lead to terrible reply rates tho

My screen time was 10 hours today. I’m an actual NPC

Literally how I ran out of someone’s house when police pulled up at one of my first proper house parties ever

How do you even tell if it’s incredible? Who do you compare it to?

Imagine it was magnetic

Must of been one hell of a whine

Gone but never forgotten

Nah it’s a spending 20 seconds just staring at the receipt look

Ppl don’t know about the Omegle character building phase. First time I acc got annoyed then I clocked that’s exactly what he wanted.

Nah he’s playing a character in a skit about someone’s obnoxious first time in London. Desi is too jokes