I hope my future husband looks at me in the mornings how I look at my leftover pizza.Ya it's looked better but it still makes my heart happy

I wish I could text my dog

Nothing like chugging margaritas and then going to Costco... yes this is what my ife in the suburbs in my mid-twenties had turned into

Why do I walk through TJ Maxx and always get an adrenaline rush????

Traveling pet peeve: when people watch their videos on their phone on full blast in the airport. Karen, put your dingle dongles in and keep it yourself. I don’t want to hear your grandkids Layton and Payton sing twinkle twinkle star. Thank you & goodnight.

Help: I’m a basic bish who can’t stop buying candles.

ITS FREAKIN BATS I LOVE HALLOWEEN

If a ghost tries to haunt you this October, remember to be honest and tell them you have a lot on your plate right now and literally cannot deal with them

Breaking my month(S) long twitter silence to come blast Uber Eats... 2019 is truly a time to be alive. Stand Up, Speak Out... about Companies who you have loyalty loved for years who disappoint you 2019

Normally I’m @Uber @UberEats @Uber_Support biggest fan... but after getting our work order 95% wrong for a Team Meeting, and customer service not helping us resolve our issue looks like we are saying bye bye to food delivery. #itsbeenreal #hasntbeenfun #disappointed

Did you know that WORRYING about money, is not the same thing as MANAGING your money? It's true.

Wow ok nothing makes you stick to your diet more than when you find yourself watching My 600-Pound Life...

“You have such a pretty face you should be on a Christmas card”

💛

Where would you rather go on a honeymoon if time and money weren’t a factor ?