Gene Mello

A chance meeting that changed my life... On July 14, I got a message that stopped me in my tracks: It was from a man named Wade Lytal. His 8-year-old daughter, Kellyanne, was one of the 27 little girls who lost their lives in the tragic flooding at Camp Mystic on July 4. "Being a college football coach it is easy to drift away and only focus on my career but the way you explained the real amount of time we have with our kiddos really struck me. It helped me cherish those last few months I had with my daughter. It made a lasting impact on my life." I read it aloud to my wife, our son nearby playing with his toys, and we both immediately began to cry. To have suffered such an unimaginable loss—and yet, to have the grace, presence, and spirit to send a message like that—I knew this man was different. I knew I had to meet him. Last week, I pulled up to a small lunch restaurant in San Antonio and sat in the courtyard. A young man came around the corner and entered the courtyard, a warm smile masking his tired eyes. For an hour, we sat and talked over a simple meal. About his daughter, Kellyanne, a beautiful girl with a heart overflowing with kindness and a bold, courageous spirit. About loss. The struggle. The indescribably painful waves of grief. About faith. The church. The community who had wrapped them in love. About identity. The questions about never being the same again. About accepting that the same is no longer an option. About fatherhood. Being a pillar of strength for his wife and second daughter. Showing up for them as his duty. His responsibility. And most of all, about time. The time he had cherished with Kellyanne. The memories he had created with her. The precious moments. The lack of regrets because he knew he had been present in those last few months. He had really been there. He had really loved her. And she knew that. I got in the car, called my wife, and broke down. All I could think to say was this: He didn’t know it was the last time. But he lived like it was. Writer and philosopher Sam Harris once said, “No matter how many times you do something, there will come a day when you do it for the last time.” There will be a last time your kids want you to read them a bedtime story. A last time you’ll go for a long walk with your sibling. A last time you’ll hug your parents. A last time your friend will call you for support. All of the things we take for granted today are things we’ll wish we could go back and do. There’s a last time for all of it. You won’t know when it’s the last time. But you can live like it is. *** I feel an immense gratitude and privilege that Wade (@CoachLytal) reached out and allowed me to share this story with the world. My hope is that it creates ripples in the way you live... To pause just a little bit longer. To hug just a little bit harder. To live like it's the last time.

The recipe for a good life.