Jedi. Professor. CEO of your mom. These are my views and do not necessarily represent everyone's views, including my employer ​and probably my wife.

SLC, UT
Joined October 2008
If there isn’t an aging rock band in upstate New York playing dive bars on the weekend named Viagra Falls, I’ll be disappointed.
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I speak for all men when I say we are ready to give women pockets. Deep, practical, stylish pockets. On any piece of clothing you want. But you have to give up Christmas cards. Forever.
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New logo...who dis?
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If there isn’t a auto salvage yard in the world called the “Carsmashians”, I’m going to be disappointed.
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There has never in my lifetime been a Congressional hearing more damning to a President. Never. This makes Watergate’s darkest moments look like a bridge club meeting.
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I know this is not a main point, but what was the ketchup for? Chickie Nugs? Tater tots?
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If you invite me to your house you better have animals. Because I plan to be anti-social and give them all my attention.
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If men bore children, abortion rights would have been established for over 200 years. #RoeVsWade #SCOTUS
Matt M. retweeted
THE GOLDEN STATE WARRIORS ARE ON TOP OF THE WORLD‼️
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Former @SaltLakeCC Bruin, Gary Payton II @Garydwayne wins an NBA Championship with the Golden State Warriors. #gobruins #slccbruins #DubNation
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What a day. #SLCCGrad
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💙💛💙💛 #slccgrad
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If The Madolorian is Star Wars’ western, The Book of Boba Fett is Star Wars’ mob series.
And yet, didn’t Conservatives want content platforms brought to task for censoring Conservative voices? Also, this is not a single-day anomaly. This is norm.
The top-performing link posts by U.S. Facebook pages in the last 24 hours are from: 1. Ben Shapiro 2. Franklin Graham 3. Catholic Fundamentalism 4. NPR 5. Fox News 6. Dan Bongino 7. Electrek. co 8. Ben Shapiro 9. Ben Shapiro 10. Ben Shapiro
Me: No serial killer will ever lure me into their murder van. I' m too smart for that. Murderer:
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I couldn't be happier that Buster Posey's final baseball game was a loss to the @Dodgers
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Early 80’s Retro Economy.
Inflation is back. The past year has seen more than a 5% jump in the Consumer Price Index. While the price of food, gas, cars and lumber are all up. @OnPointRadio hears from economists on what inflation really is, and how it works. wbur.fm/2Zg4wCR
My kid’s newly created D&D character for his friend’s next campaign for their undercover witch coven is… Bob Devin. 🤦🏼‍♂️
Remember a year ago when the Republican controlled legislature in Utah wanted to withhold front-line pay because SLC teachers were teaching online? Pepperidge Farms remembers. #utpol
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Welcome to Southern Utah. 🪵
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