Dan

One of the saddest realities of life is that sometimes, by the time you become the person you have always wanted to be, some of the people you desperately wanted to share it with are no longer around. Some people will never get to see the version of you they spent years praying, sacrificing and hoping you would become. Imagine spending years working towards a better life, wanting to build a house your parents can be proud of, wanting to give them the comfort they never had, wanting to take them places and buy them things they could only admire from a distance. Then, just when you finally have the means to do all these things, you realise that death has taken away the people you were doing it for. You keep telling yourself that one day, when you are financially comfortable, you will do this and that for them. You postpone certain experiences because you believe there is still enough time. But life doesn't always give you that luxury.

A lot of people are not good people. They are just people who have never been in a position where being good would cost them something. Many people are not as principled as they think. They have simply never been sufficiently tempted. It is easy to talk about loyalty when you have nothing to gain from betraying someone. It is easy to preach honesty when the truth doesn't threaten your interests. It is easy to condemn infidelity when you have never had an opportunity to cheat without getting caught. It is easy to talk about integrity when doing the right thing doesn't come at a personal cost. I think we sometimes give people too much credit for virtues they have never actually had to demonstrate under pressure. Your character is not fully revealed by what you say you would never do. It is revealed by what you have the opportunity to do, what you stand to gain from doing it, and what you choose when nobody can hold you accountable.