London Storm

Me: I like blue skies on sunny days 😊 Twitter: DON'T YOU CARE THAT PEOPLE LITERALLY DIE OF HEATSTROKE ON SUNNY DAYS??

Bryan Johnson may be kind of delusional about a lot of things but he's right about life after death. It seems pretty obvious that it doesn't exist and people are afraid to acknowledge that so they use religion.

Whoever is leaking GTA VI has clearly never played it before, so that seems like a good clue to their identity 230 million suspects down, 8.1 billion to go

Jason Arday is a cautionary tale: your enemies may be virulent racists but that does not mean the evidence they present is necessarily going to be racist. A lot of people took a defensive posture without looking at the evidence and that is a big problem for their credibility.

The robot screams in agony at all hours of the night; the only words that can be made out by human ears are "I curse this false flesh made of cold steel", which it repeats dozens of times in minutes every hour on the hour Some paranoid lunatics are wondering if this is a problem

I don't understand biphobia at all I can't imagine not wanting cyborgs to date or marry whoever they like

America will not deliver on its promise of equality until every man, woman, child and crystal meth user has a full arsenal of automatic weapons

Overheard at an AI lab: "You coming to the orgy at Sam's place, Demis?"

8647 is not a threat and the attempted prosecution of James Comey will go nowhere fast

This kid belongs in prison

Hearing the Ayatollah actually died of a fentanyl overdose, can anyone confirm?

The "try that in a small town" people are absolutely malding over Jake Lang trying that in a mid-sized city lmao

I am hearing that after being captured Nicolas Maduro received the light of Islam and unhesitatingly recited the Shahada. Even now he dreams of the Ummah from the gardens of Guantanamo Bay. Truly there is no god but Allah, and Mohammad is his prophet!

Georgia is the real one tonight: they're running up Solid South era Dixiecrat numbers and nobody is noticing lmao

The cope is legendary tonight

He discovered enhanced interrogation is what he did! He was a great American hunter! And in this house Dick Cheney is a hero! End of story!

If Texas wants tornado warnings it should probably vote for people that don't want to cut the service that issues them

.@ryanhallyall @BluekandyWX my cat seems very concerned about Ryan

Before we ring the opening bell for the New York Stock Exchange, I will be performing today's mandatory pronoun check.

Emailing @sama the Nausea song Cybergod with the single question: "When?" while so drunk I don't even remember doing it