The best way to decide what club to rush is to put their names into 1 Corinthians 13:
“Kappa” is patient and kind.
“Iota” is not jealous or boastful.
“Chi” is not irritable.
Social distancing is to help stop the spread of COVID-19, but also the spread of a much bigger enemy: PDA.
The 10 Plagues, circa 2020
1. wildfires
2. pandemic
3. online school
4. murder hornets
5. Sahara sandstorm
6-10. tbd
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The time has come for me to step down as owner of this account. If someone else wants to take over, DM me or something. Otherwise, it’s been a good run ✌🏻
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Merry Christmas Eve conspiracy enthusiasts! If you leave out double the milk and cookies, you’ll get gifts from Santa and a staff parking pass from campus police!
Merry Friday the 13th! It’s been said if you don’t hug Lois before graduation, you’re going to fall onstage. Don’t make that mistake.
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If you don’t eat a cinnamon roll handed to you by Johnny D at late night breakfast, you will fail your finals. Eat a Johnny D blessed cinnamon roll for good luck.
The hot chocolate at Lighting of the Commons gets spiked with grape juice for anyone didn’t go to church on Sunday. This way, they at least get half of communion for the week.
If your professor hasn’t cancelled class today, it’s because they are secretly hoping you’ll skip so they can use the projectors to watch Netflix all day. Don’t give them that chance. Go to class.
Every time Jarrett doesn’t wear his Kellogg’s shirt for a New Reign performance, the C in the OC logo gets a little bit shorter.
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OC is required every year to meet a “couples quota,” so they bribe us with free food and events in the form of Date Week in hopes that the ingrained feeling of being incomplete without a mate will take over.
The parade loop is only 2 laps around the Bible building because if we kept going, it would end up being a walls of Jericho situation.
The new gazebo is actually built with money from ring by spring fanatics who wanted new scenery for marriage proposals.
The PEC at night works like Night at the Museum except instead of the statues and figures coming to life, it’s the dead bodies in the cadaver lab. Happy Halloween 👻
Students: hey can we get better apartments on campus?
OC: Look, you got 4 kudos taken off your total!
Students: that’s great but what about working fire alar-
OC: NEW CAFETERIA HOW FUN!!!
