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University debate: "The gorilla proves you can build strength on plants alone." Vegan: "400 pounds of muscle. Never touched a steak or a protein shake. If leaves are enough for him, they're enough for a man in a gym." Anthropologist: "How much does he eat?" Vegan: "A lot. He's a big animal." Anthropologist: "40 pounds a day. He chews for most of his waking life. Where does it go?" Vegan: "His stomach." Anthropologist: "His colon. More than half his gut is a fermenting vat. Bacteria break the leaves down. Into what?" Vegan: "Nutrients. Energy." Anthropologist: "Fatty acids. Nearly 60% of his calories arrive as fat, made in-house." Vegan: "That can't be right. Leaves have no fat in them." Anthropologist: "The leaves don't. The gorilla does. One of those acids is butyrate. It's named after butter." Vegan: "Then we can do the same." Anthropologist: "With what? Your colon's a fifth of your gut. You'd get wind and about 5% of your calories." Vegan: "Plenty of vegan bodybuilders manage." Anthropologist: "On pea isolate, soya isolate, creatine, B12 and a blender. None of which grows in the Congo." Vegan: "So the gorilla isn't plant-based?" Anthropologist: "The gorilla is a fat-burner with a brewery attached. The only one in this debate living on raw carbohydrate and willpower is you." Moderator: "Does the proposer wish to respond?" Vegan: "He's still vegan." Anthropologist: "He also eats his own droppings. I'd pick your role models one habit at a time."