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Staywoke, Staysane • Chelsea #CFC • COYB 💙.

Earth
Joined June 2026
Photo by Samora🥷🏽🥶 (@Samora4u)Photo by Samora🥷🏽🥶 (@Samora4u)Photo by Samora🥷🏽🥶 (@Samora4u)Photo by Samora🥷🏽🥶 (@Samora4u)Photo by Samora🥷🏽🥶 (@Samora4u)Photo by Samora🥷🏽🥶 (@Samora4u)Photo by Samora🥷🏽🥶 (@Samora4u)Photo by Samora🥷🏽🥶 (@Samora4u)Photo by Samora🥷🏽🥶 (@Samora4u)
Hardest s*x scene in history.
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How can I unlock an iPhone I was gifted?
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Samora🥷🏽🥶 retweeted
When you know your value, you stop auditioning for approval.
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He be like Matta don dey face repercussions 😭😂 !
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I’m noticing that when my week is structured, my emotions are calmer. Planning doesn’t just improve work, it improves stability.
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💙☀️ THURSDAY GOOD MORNING, X FAMILY! 🙏🏽 May this Thursday bring us peace, good news, answered prayers, open doors, and blessings beyond our expectations. May our efforts yield success, our hearts find happiness, and our timelines be filled with genuine love and positive energy. 🤲✨ May we all win in silence and celebrate loudly! ❤️ Good morning, my X mutuals! 🫂💙
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My manager called me on Sunday evening and asked me to come to the office early on Monday. He said the CEO needed an urgent report before an important meeting. I arrived at 6:30 a.m. and discovered that my manager was already there with two HR officers. Manager: “We need to discuss a serious complaint against you.” I was confused. HR explained that someone had accused me of leaking confidential client information to a competitor. They showed me screenshots of emails supposedly sent from my account. I denied everything and requested access to the original records. My manager smiled. Manager: “The evidence is clear. You should consider resigning before this becomes a bigger issue.”
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The moment Peller said he's not a fan of music but he feels Muyeez's "MORTAL KOMBAT" song 😭🔥 Once you try to dive into that boy's discography, you'll end up making him your favorite. Muyeez is just that good, NGL ❤️🐺🔥
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Sometimes, I sit quietly and think about our childhood, and I can’t help but smile and feel a little pain in my heart. Not because those days were perfect, but because they were filled with something money cannot buy today: genuine family connection. I remember those evenings after a long day of school, work, and household chores. Once dinner was ready and everyone had settled down, we would gather in the parlour. Daddy would sit in his favourite chair, watching the 8 p.m. news on television, occasionally shaking his head at the stories being reported. Sometimes, he would suddenly turn to us and ask, “What do you people think about what this man is saying?” And just like that, the whole parlour would turn into a debate hall. Everybody had an opinion. My elder brother would speak confidently, even when he didn’t know all the facts. My sister would challenge his argument. I would jump into the conversation, determined to prove that my own point made more sense. Daddy would pretend to be annoyed when we talked over one another, but deep down, I think he enjoyed watching us think, argue respectfully, and learn from one another. Meanwhile, Mummy was the life of the gathering. She would sit with us, telling funny stories about her childhood, sharing family secrets that weren’t really secrets, and reminding us of the embarrassing things we had done when we were younger….
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Can we agree this is the best seasoning cube?
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A suspected Yahoo boy beat up a thief in our area, and I couldn't stop thinking about the irony. Imagine two people who have both chosen the faculty of stealing, but one is in the Department of Online Operations while the other is in the Department of Physical Operations. One steals through a phone. The other steals through your pocket. One can spend hours explaining why he deserves your money. The other simply takes it and runs. But somehow, when they meet, one suddenly becomes a defender of law and order. The thief probably went home wondering why his colleague in the stealing industry was treating him like a criminal. Nigeria is a very interesting place. Even among people doing the wrong thing, some still believe they have the moral high ground.
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Our new HR director introduced a policy requiring every manager to document why an employee deserved a promotion. She said the company would no longer reward people simply because they were popular with senior management. Most employees welcomed the change. My supervisor, however, was furious. He had promised his favourite employee a promotion and expected the process to be a formality. When the results were announced, the position went to a quiet analyst who had consistently delivered strong results. The supervisor refused to congratulate her. Instead, he began assigning her impossible deadlines and criticising every small mistake. She continued doing her work until one afternoon, when he accused her of deliberately withholding a report. He sent an email copying the CEO and demanded disciplinary action. The analyst replied with a timestamped record showing that she had submitted the report three days earlier.
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The CEO arrived at the office earlier than usual and found an employee asleep beneath his desk. He woke him up immediately. CEO: “Is this a hotel?” Employee: “No, sir. I’m sorry.” CEO: “You are being paid $4,000 a month, and you can’t stay awake during working hours?” The employee apologized repeatedly. The CEO ordered HR to issue him a warning. Later that afternoon, the employee’s team leader came to the CEO’s office. Team Leader: “Sir, please don’t punish him.” CEO: “Are you telling me sleeping at work is acceptable?” Team Leader: “No, sir. But he’s been working overnight because our new system keeps failing. He’s been here until 3 a.m. for the past two weeks.” The CEO frowned. CEO: “Why wasn’t I informed?” Team Leader: “I sent you four reports.” The CEO checked his email and found them. Each report had been marked as resolved by the IT department.
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Only three hours after checking into my hotel, I lifted the pillow like I always do to have a quick look… and found a whole bunch of ladybugs hiding underneath. I’m choosing to see it as a blessing though, because apparently ladybugs are supposed to bring good luck.
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When your mom says "no phone while eating" and you think she's joking 😭😅
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Is it appropriate for a man to kneel when proposing to a woman? Traditionally, who is expected to kneel during a marriage proposal—the man or the woman?
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20 FOODS THAT ARE GOOD FOR YOUR HEART🫀✅ 1. Beans 🫘 2. Carrots 🥕 3. Blueberries 🫐 4. Broccoli 🥦 5. Brown rice 🌾 6. Bell Peppers 🫑 7. Cantaloupe 🍈 8. Dark chocolate 🍫 9. Flaxseed 10. Oatmeal 🥣 11. Oranges 🍊 12. Papaya 13. Salmon 14. Soy 15. Tomatoes 🍅 16. Tuna 17. Walnuts 18. Apples 🍎 19. Almonds 20. Avocado 🥑
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You do wedding finish dem dey carry you go the man house you dey cry. No be where you dey go spend weekends before? 😂😂😂
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🚨JUST IN: Apple's fully upgraded touchscreen MacBook Pro reportedly costs up to $14,549. That's the price of a used Tesla Model 3.
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Are youths really lazy, or is the country making it difficult for hardworking young people to succeed? 🇳🇬🤔 – at Enugu, Nigeria
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