In the middle of a fever dream an Indian toddler coughed into my eye.
Okay. That’s fair. That’s on me, @SpiritAirlines. I should have known that there would be extra charges. That ticket was too cheap.
Saul Trujillo retweeted
Wednesday don't miss The Dirty at 10:30 with @NotHormones @SaulComedy @mostlysorry @GeorgePComedy #feliciafolkes #danielmoquin @J_Potter
Tickets at showclix.com/event/dirty1030…
#thecomedystore
Saul Trujillo retweeted
Tuesday at 8pm in the Belly Room #BURIED with @craigpconant @SteveFurey @annielederman @IanEdwardsComic @drewdunncomedy @SaulComedy #ericfriedman
Tickets at showclix.com/event/buried-ju…
#thecomedystore
Two days ago in NY, I saw @MarkRuffalo eat a wild berry off a tree in Central Park and I thought “what an asshole.”
Today in Boston, I ate edibles some random lady at Fenway park handed me.
My bad, Mark. You were just enjoying the fruits of your environment. I get it now. 😅
Saul Trujillo retweeted
Karate at a comedy show! @blaucomedy
See Michael tonight at 8:30 in The Lab with @princessshenk @FerazOzel @BillyBonnell @SaulComedy @andywoodhull +more! Get tickets at hollywoodimprov.com #hollywoodimprov #comedy
Saul Trujillo retweeted
Just Announced: We've added a Main Room show tomorrow night at 10:15 with @MrCraigRobinson @StephTolev @eddiepepitone @SaulComedy +more TBA! Tickets on sale now at hollywoodimprov.com #hollywoodimprov #comedy
Saul Trujillo retweeted
Wives farting at the store. @SaulComedy
See Saul Tonight at 8:30 in The Lab Hell Yeah! With @Radioliam @TheFunnyCarmen @GreyDeLisle +more! Get tickets at hollywoodimprov.com #hollywoodimprov #comedy
Saul Trujillo retweeted
May 24th in the Belly Room don't miss the first #dirtyat1030 with @NotHormones @SaulComedy @kimberlycongdon @kurtmetzger #robsmallwood @anthonyamorello @NicoleBecannon
Get your tickets at embed.showclix.com/event/dir…
#thecomedystore
Saul Trujillo retweeted
You don't give teachers guns... @sydneyisfunny
See Sydney tonight at 7:30 in The Lab @LTNSComedy with @lolbrandidenise @jeremiahstandup @SaulComedy @iamjackiegold +more! Get tickets at hollywoodimprov.com #hollywoodimprov #comedy #teachers
Saul Trujillo retweeted
Comedian @SaulComedy is our guest on #whatsupfoolpodcast this week. This foo has been paying his dues & now it's paying off. Go check him out at a show near you!
* * *
Watch on my youtube channel (youtube.com/felipeesparza) or listen on all podcast apps & streaming audio platforms.
Other comics: “we better leave him alone, he’s probably going over his set”
Me: *watching a reel of a white lady making homemade treats for a dog in a sweater*
I’m such a procrastinator that I’ll wait to the very last set of underwear til I have to wash clothes. And even then, the tip of my dickhead will know what the raw feeling of denim is like until the chafe causes me to cave and do laundry.
Sure, I’m flying @SpiritAirlines, but little do you queefs know I got “upgrade to the bigger seat” money.
Happy Valentine’s Day to all the single people out there.
Go fuck someone raw today.
Take a gamble.
Maybe you’ll find a baby mama/daddy to hate and you’ll never be alone ever again. 🥰😚
Witness: The man had a hoarse voice.
Detective: He like neighed and stuff?
Witness: Neighed?
Detective: *makes a horse sound*
Witness: No, his voice was like raspy and deep.
Detective: Most horse voices would be.
Not all farts are bad. The one that slips out while you’re peeing is an unexpected aftershock that happens while you’re in pure euphoria.









