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Boss walked in on my writing a cover letter for another job

Unfortunately still my fashion inspo idc

fuck my phone died while I was p👀ping.,.,,.good thing I have my laptop and iPad with me

Doctor put the catheter into my arm wrong and I told him it hurts really bad and he said “if you could just deal with it for now that’d be cool”

Maintaining my adolescence by constantly gripping the straps of my backpack when I walk

So constipated that pooping has become a completely foreign concept to me…

Got asked my name for my boba order and I went “ummm…”

Stubbed my toe so hard the electrical signals in my brain warped and now I see a new shade of blue

Grandma asked when I’m having kids

I need to end my duo lingo streak so bad but I’m genuinely scared the owl is going to k1ll himself

I drive every day. Gun to my head, no idea what my license plate is

Slayyyter sounds so good when you’re running 30 minutes late for work

My dream blunt rotation is my friends Niall, Maggie, and Dylan

One of the girls living at the apartment I was touring today slyly handed me a note with her number that said “CALL ME ABOUT APARTMENT”

Naps hit so hard when you have extremely time sensitive things to do that will have catastrophic repercussions if not completed in time

Eating a banana with strawberry cream cheese in a tortilla and received a state issued noise complaint for how loud I’m moaning