"I want to cry all the time, my eyes won't let me" that one hit so close to home for me. I hope all you men are doing well. If you need help seek it, if you need to vent my DM's are open. A few years ago I checked myself into a psych hospital, it was the best thing I did in my life. I still struggle, but taking that step helped my mental health so much. I'm lucky that my city has a great psych hospital, not every town/city has a good one, and I really feel for you all for that. Also in all the time I was in there, there was 1 other guy, the rest were women. Which is fine, but I think it really shows that us men really do push all those dark thoughts and feelings down.