David Cichon (@TheBeerSamurai) profile picture

David Cichon

@TheBeerSamurai

Just another idiot with nothing important to say, but who's gonna say it anyway.

 New Jersey
thebeersamurai.com
Joined December 2011
  • Tweets39
  • Following10
  • Followers7
3Media
Photo by David Cichon (@TheBeerSamurai)Photo by David Cichon (@TheBeerSamurai)Photo by David Cichon (@TheBeerSamurai)
Join Jersey Johnny & The Beer Samurai in the first video tease. And stay tuned to find out the launch date & time for the 1st Craft Beer Podcast next week!
1
1
Don't forget, tonight at 5:30pm EDT we will be teasing next week's launch of the Craft Beer Podcast on Facebook Live! #craftbeer #podcast #thelagerroom #njcraftbeer #ricraftbeer @TheBeerSamurai
Image from The Lager Room Guys! Podcast (@thelagerroom)
1
1
1
Yesterday's cheese binge is cancelling this morning's coffee's efficacy. I should have brought the crossword with me.
Me: Imma go sit on the porch and watch the storm roll in. My Balls: But it's hot as me out there and you'll sweat me off. Me: All you've ever done is got me in trouble, one way or the other. My Balls: But we're fam! Me: Nice knowing ya! I'll send a Christmas card.
You can be a fabulous father like @XplodingUnicorn but when you're birthday rolls around, the length of the celebration is still calculated in minutes. Women calculate theirs in days, up to, and including, one full month.
1
1
16
The only two white actors in Black Panther are Martin Freeman, who played Bilbo Baggins, and Andy Serkis who played Gollum. They're the Tolkien white guys.
712
31,919
2,121
134,200
I am immortal... ...so far.
David Cichon retweeted
Elon Musk (@elonmusk) profile picture
Elon Musk
@elonmusk2 Feb 2018
Apparently, some customs agencies are saying they won’t allow shipment of anything called a “Flamethrower”. To solve this, we are renaming it “Not a Flamethrower”.
4,203
52,706
4,272
278,454
Freezing for a reason! 2018 Polar Bear Plunge! Donations benefit the NJ Special Olympics! - classy.org/fundraiser/124607…
No, Attorney General Sessions. Marijuana is not the same as heroin. No one who has seriously studied the issue believes that. Quite the contrary. We should allow states the right to move toward the decriminalization of marijuana, not reverse the progress that has been made.
2,337
34,776
1,951
116,424
I have a theory that some people are soulless automatons and put here for the sole purpose of getting in my way.
.@KFC follows 11 people. Those 11 people? 5 Spice Girls and 6 guys named Herb. 11 Herbs & Spices. I need time to process this.
2,998
224,901
20,601
516,268
When making the bed, whatever corner you start the fitted sheet with, you're wrong.
Reasons People Have Kids: 1st kid: "We wanted a family" 2nd: "She needed someone to play with" 3rd: "Birth control is only 99% effective"
48
457
59
2,898
Evening out my convertible tan with a snorkeling tan. Now I need just need to wear a sandwich board for a while to catch up the sides.
#idontrun
Image from David Cichon (@TheBeerSamurai)
[carbonite freezing chamber] Leia: I love you. Han: I know. Leia: *death glare* Vader: Wrong answer, bro.
2
198
1
754
Make nasty comments about an ethnicity. Get a judge of that ethnicity. Ask he be recused because he can't be impartial. That takes balls.
This man clearly understands the real purpose for golf. teapaw.org/XplodingUnicorn/status…
James Breakwell, Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) profile pictureJames Breakwell, Exploding Unicorn@XplodingUnicorn5 Jun 2016
Me: *gets back from golf* Wife: How did you do? Me: 12 beers. Wife: No, how many times did you hit the ball? Me: There was a ball?
Getting my grill on, on National Wine Day (and International Towel Day) with an amazing woman.
Image from David Cichon (@TheBeerSamurai)
1
Load more