xparadox

In the 1960s the CIA spent $20 million turning a cat into a spy. Project Acoustic Kitty. An actual cat. surgically modified. with a microphone in its ear canal, a radio transmitter at the base of its skull, and a wire antenna woven through its fur all the way to its tail. the project was called Operation Acoustic Kitty. the idea: cats wander freely near embassies and parks without raising suspicion. a cat sitting near two Soviet diplomats on a bench is just a cat. a cat with a transmitter in its skull is an intelligence asset. the technical challenges were enormous. this was the 1960s. no microchips. the CIA had to miniaturize a microphone, transmitter, battery, and antenna small enough to fit inside a living animal that still had to look like a normal cat. they solved most of it. then discovered the cat kept wandering off whenever it got hungry. so they performed a second surgery to suppress its hunger drive. the CIA surgically rewired a cat's brain because it wanted snacks. five years. $20 million. additional hunger-suppression surgery. the cat was finally ready. 1966. Washington DC. a park near the Soviet Embassy on Wisconsin Avenue. two men on a bench. CIA agents in an unmarked van filled with surveillance equipment. they opened the door and released their operative. the cat walked ten feet and was hit by a taxi. the CIA's internal memo described the project as a "remarkable scientific achievement" and praised the team for proving that cats could be trained to move short distances. the memo that declared a $20 million program dead called it a remarkable achievement. then concluded: given "environmental and security factors" cats would "not be practical" for intelligence work. the CIA spent five years and $20 million to discover that cats don't follow orders. anyone who has ever owned a cat could have told them.