@USUAltimate

The National Parody Account for the sport of Ultimate in the United States.

 Bonanza, CO
Joined September 2013
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  • Following68
  • Followers3.1K
96Media
The 2024 USA Ultimate D-I College Championships have been canceled.
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UPDATE: Mid-Atlantic Club Regionals has been canceled. (Permanently. Forever.)
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Narcing on your opponents is actually the highest form of respect. If you disagree, you don’t fully understand Spirit of the Game.
Wally Kwong@Wally_Kwong16 Mar 2023
Replying to @mgdmitch
The rules now allow for sideline players to call offsides in games without observers, yet I’ve not seen any team do it. Outside teams I coach 😁
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The 2023 Club Uniform Guidelines stipulate that players in all divisions are prohibited from growing facial hair or wearing jersey numbers higher than 30. usaultimate.org/news/2023/02…

2022 Competition Working Group Meeting: Club Update | USA Ultimate

Colorado Springs, Colo. (Feb. 8, 2023) – USA Ultimate’s Competition Working Group met in Denver last December for its annual meeting to discuss various

usaultimate.org
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He forgot to shotgun a beer.
Ultimate Frisbee Association 🥏 UFA@watchUFAtv19 Jan 2023
Offseason vibes with Matt Smith 🏝️🌊 MTA x Hurricane Catch @atlantahustle | #AUDL2023
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Let’s not forget to credit @theAUDL, hosts of the original Shred Fest.
Ultimate Herald-Trib@UltiHerald1 May 2015
15 Players Who Have Shredded Their Penises on AUDL Turf.
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Yes. The PDGA and DGPT can unequivocally fuck off.
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Ha. Nerds.
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Do we look like an organization that’s got “repair the history pages” money?
Brody@WilliamBrotman21 Oct 2022
Replying to @USUAltimate
I don't know if USAU has plans to repair the history pages. The old ones are still at archive.usaultimate.org/arch… but they also partnered with us to help build out ultimate-reference.com/playe…
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Do we look like an organization that’s got “functional website” money?
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Do we look like an organization that’s got “new commercial” money?
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Exactly.
Being Goalty@Being_goalty26 Sep 2022
Replying to @USUAltimate
the fuck is an Aria
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Pay for it with some of that Aria money, you nerds. We put that shit in the rulebook as a joke. You’re not actually supposed to play with those.
Revival@RVAXFlatball25 Sep 2022
I would like a refund of $22.10 for parking from @USUAltimate. Please and thank you.
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There are many differences between USA Ultimate and the AUDL, but one thing is for certain: Tom Crawford’s nudes have more tasteful composition, better lighting, and his bush is much tidier.
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SFI East games will resume at 4:00, but if anyone says anything about how it’s “just as hot as this morning” we are going to, like, totally freak out.
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ATTENTION: Games at SFI East will resume once the BOFA Index falls below 7. Stay tuned for updates.
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USA Ultimate retweeted
Tad Wissel@DVE_Tad31 May 2022
Live ultimate.
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This is way too much info. Can you all do the “5-4, offense holds” thing like everyone else?
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If you think $300 is a lot, wait until you see the fines we're gonna start giving out for the jerk off hand motion. ⏪✊⏩
Bama Secs@bamasecs16 Mar 2022
Does this mean we’re a real sport now or…? #legitimacy
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Don’t forget that “strenuously contest” is also a valid option.
Robyn Fennig@wi_statebird21 Dec 2021
Why do American ultimate players use “contest” and “no contest” to disagree or agree with a call? In Europe, the options are “contest” and “accept,” which makes more sense to me (especially given the hand signals). Why don’t Americans also use “accept” for discussing calls?
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