πŸ‰πŸ™ (@aleesian_) header
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Joined November 2011
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I was so stressed about accidentally hitting his head walking through doorways & letting go of him to grab something. Endless hallucinations of accidentally dropping him.
Okay I feel for all the post partum moms dealing with neurosis…but also some of these are hilarious
15
β€œDon’t you got a man?!?” - my DADDY when I asked him for money & had a man….
Do u btches ask yall DADDY for money like that ??? Do yall dads fund yall whole life ??
32
An undisturbed bitch.
People who are on Do Not Disturb 24/7 who the fuck do you think you are?
39
Accidentally bought my man some women’s pj’s for Christmas. He later complained about the lack of pockets & how stupid it was. I showed him that literally none of my other pj’s have pockets. All of his do. So idk we still need more things with pockets actually.
β€œIt has pockets” is such an annoying millennial thing like it needs to die
24
I’ve had multiple nurses & doctors explain how I should interpret the pain scale as 10 being a broken bone w/o seeing that I’ve had a really bad ankle break on record. And tbh broken bones are some of the most mild pain I’ve experienced.
1
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In fact, I fell in the shower while my leg bones were healing & asked for more pain meds & they told I could go buy some Tylenol.
1
17
When you’re smarter than a man he will def try and argue about every little thing. Like pls don’t make me have to insult you too, cuz now you pissin me off.
18
This really is the key to life lmaooo
When you finally accept the fact you’re fuckin nuts
7
I use to work with a bunch of Brazilian’s who would have me speak to them in Spanish and then answer me in English cuz I absolutely could not understand them in Portuguese.
If you know Portuguese you know Spanish, but if you know Spanish, you do NOT automatically know Portuguese hahaha
18
I get real suspicious when seeking sympathy online becomes openly asking for money.
2
My sister be moving states & giving niggas money, then stalking and harassing when they move on to another woman all the while posting β€œthirst traps” for other niggas to comment on and I hate say I see a pattern but πŸ‘€πŸ‘€πŸ‘€πŸ‘€
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7
Not even saying that man and his girl aren’t in the wrong, they most likely are too, but I’ve seen this play out up close and usually everyone is in the wrong. So no use taking sides & playing detective. And yall cash apping are just falling for the scam, my god.
4
My entire TL is just recent twitter scandal and natural hair debate. Meanwhile, the world is literally burning all around us. Y’all know we’re in SEVERAL wars?!?!!!! Well yall are, I live in Spain.
9
Also, I’ve googled my name many a time, and all of my phone numbers and addresses are readily available for free on Google. And so are yours.
8
I’ve got no dog in this fight, but if a bitch want your number she’ll get it. A bitch got my number from our employee files to text me abt a man I wasn’t even with, she assumed I was cuz he stopped fucking with her & she saw my car parked at his house while she was stalking him.
18
Sometimes I hate knowing how to read and write on a text app with a bunch of illiterate dumbasses.
6
The pica Haribo ositos were like crack while a I was pregnant and I just got my hands on em again a month postpartum & they are just ehh πŸ˜•
13
My dogs daycare is closing cuz she is moving to Madrid yo care for her mom & I’m so sad. We all really love them & I get so much peace of mind when my pups are there. I hope her mom gets better tho cuz I’m sure it was a tough decision to close.
11
My dad said my baby looks just like him and now no one can unsee it. The baby is the grandpa apparently. Lol.
16
When you don’t have a control complex as an adult shit like this be hard not to laugh at. Like damn baby ok you got me but I gotta stay serious cuz I’m the grown up here.
My daughter got sent out of class for being too sarcastic today. The teacher said, "What would your parents say if I called them?" She replied, "Hello!"
20
Romi el mΓ‘s guapo…ok
3
Not my baby has haters at five days oooollldddddd
6