bllix

ChatGPTits tho

New Year's Resolution: Listen to all metal songs entitled "Cthulhu"

BREAKING: #impeachment Hearings to be Held at Four Seasons Stop'n'Pawn Costume Closeouts

The entire world: "I don't usually post about political stuff, but WHAT IN THE ACTUAL FUCK"

Ok but when are we going to DO SOMETHING and RISE UP over these fishy Amazon reviews #ImpeachTrumpAgainNOW

CANADA I HAVE MONEY PLEASE LET US IN

Wow 2021, you had one job. "be less really, really bad than 2020". That's it. Just one.

OMG beautiful reindeer decorations!!

Still reeling from the historic all-female spacewalk. There is no kitchen or washing machine out there, what were they even doing the whole time?

That thing where you can't sleep and then you get really hungry and then you have to pee because fuck everything forever

BILLION-DOLLAR IDEA: Put a bunch of malfunctioning bras in space because FLOATING BOOBS

Conducting all sorts of archeological whatever-the-fuck at the giant Luxor pyramid thing located in Cigar Stank, NV

Is that a chatbot in your pocket or are you just fucking wasting my time??

From the author of 2009 best-selling crossword rulebook TITTY GUITAR STRAP DEATH BALLS

Donning my absolute gayest apparel.

Not to brag, but I'm pretty sure two toddlers greased my bra with chicken nuggets tonight.

You know shit just got real in that store aisle when you open Amazon AND the calculator.

President-Elect Nègaz B. Trèpan

President-Erect, tho

Oh well. At least Amazon has enough decency to exclude Cheetos from their free chips promo. #orangeguywtf