no guys that’s not me i swear guys

civil engineering means i have parking lot due at 11:59

sometimes my brother’s old roommate comes up on my feed and idek them that well but i’ve never seen someone embody the word slay so hard

bossa nova goes hard when you’re cooking

update: the white chick’s reading was right i’m scared

today is the second time a white person has asked me if my parents beat me

nothing says december in massachusetts like a pina colada

happy baxter day everyone

gender? i hardly know her!

you don’t want a gay best friend, you want a skinny white guy to follow you around and appropriate AAVE

college is all about getting the whitest chick you can find to read your tarot

no i love when i bump into an old tinder date at therapy no it’s fine

college kids are so easy to please i got this girl a loaf of bread for christmas and she hugged me four times

overheard on campus today: guy 1: “what’s your personal hell?” guy 2: “white women telling me about their tattoos.”

sorority big little reveals are the most terrifying thing i have ever seen

my friends told me i dress like yung gravy i’m crying don’t hmu

i just made biryani nobody can touch me i am so sexy and invincible and immortal