Greg Lane

Personal (and long) post: Like most people, I’ve often worried about what others might think of me. We all have that, to a certain extent. I’m at a point now where I genuinely don’t care, which is a great thing! So here goes. I was ashamed of this for a while, but two years ago, I was diagnosed with ADHD and executive dysfunction. It started when we went through the diagnosis process with one of my kids. It's not a big deal. A lot of people have the same diagnosis. I've come across a few people in my life, recently, who seem ashamed of their own diagnosis. And it got me thinking ... this is nothing to be ashamed of, and maybe I can help someone. So, here we are. I’ll never forget the moment. The neurologist said, “I’m going to explain to you what’s happening in your son’s brain.” I sat there and listened. After a few minutes, she asked, “Are you OK, Dad?” I think she saw the look on my face. I told her, “I can totally identify with what you’re saying right now.” She smiled and said, “It’s genetic.” I always thought the "H" in ADHD meant that you were hyper. Like, a motor that wouldn't stop. That was never me. But you know what I do often? Shake my leg while sitting because I can't sit still (I'm literally doing this as I type). If I am stuck in a chair for a few hours working, I get the sudden urge to get up and stretch, because I want to crawl out of my own skin. I went back and forth for a while on what to do, but I finally talked to my doctor about it, and it’s made a huge difference in my life. I don’t feel paralyzed by work as much anymore. There are still times when a logjam of things I need to get done stops me in my tracks, but those days are few and far between. I was always able to hyper-focus on hockey and baseball because I loved it. But I struggled to focus in other areas of my life, like my non-hockey job. Growing up, my parents said teachers always told them, “He’s really intelligent, if he would just focus a little more.” As it turns out, that's common. I can hyper-focus on things that really interest me, and completely zone out on things that don't (just ask my wife, I have a list of projects that are in various stages of competition around our house). There are a million ways to manage this and find more clarity. Some people thrive on medication. Others don’t want to go that route, and you can build new routines that, while I thought they were silly at first, have made an enormous difference for me. If you find yourself struggling with something similar and think it might be ADHD or executive dysfunction, talk to your doctor. I had no idea how much it affected me until I started to explore it. Don’t get me wrong, it can still be a struggle. Here’s a recent example. August and September were busy. I had previews to write, I fell behind, and I spent a lot of time and energy writing about, and talking to people about, the situation at ASU. Some days, I felt completely crippled by it. I’d sit down at my desk at 7 a.m. and say, “OK, today’s the day I catch up on everything,” only to fall even further behind by the end of the day. That cycle repeats itself for me a lot. I’d be in a hole, KNOW I was in a hole and have no idea where to start digging out. So instead, I’d come on here, read something about pro wrestler Bruiser Brody getting murdered in the late ’80s and go down a rabbit hole for the next four hours of articles and YouTube videos, wasting even more of the day. Anything to distract from the task! Yes, that’s a real example, lol. I’ve been shocked at how much something as simple as a daily task list, with priorities assigned, has helped. Anyway, all of this is to say that this stuff is nothing to be embarrassed about. Millions of people deal with the same thing, and we all struggle with something. I know people in my own life who have it and feel ashamed or embarrassed. They don't want people to know. I’m lucky enough that a lot of people follow me here. It's not a huge following, but more than the average person on this app. Many of the followers are young people (hockey players). So I wanted to take a small step toward letting people know it’s nothing to be embarrassed about. And who knows, maybe someone reads this and it helps them. That would be great. Now, back to your regularly scheduled college hockey content. 🤘