writer, producer, socialist // currently @zeteonews previously @levernews @wtfpod @buzzfeed @earwolf // co-host of https://xitter.cf/t.co/2p13YcglnW // from NJ // mostly jokes
Brooklyn, NY
Joined February 2011
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Loathed Slob Threatens Mayoral Challenge Against Beloved Sweetie Pie
Watters: You might run against Mamdani?
Portnoy: I would love to run against—if I was going to run, it would be here. Can I win here? I have no idea.
I’ve done a lot of good in NYC, whether it was the Barstool Fund or pizza places, so it wasn’t for show. I’ve had a real job. I’ve done real things, unlike these clown politicians who have never had a job and have never been in the real world for a day
frank cappello retweeted
Ironically it was actually @nickshirleyy who appears to have stayed in a sanctioned hotel on his trip while @hasanthehun obeyed the state dept requirements.
Federal officials have served subpoenas to Marxist political influencer Hasan Piker and CodePink cofounder Susan Medea Benjamin as part of a wider investigation into whether U.S. organizations and leaders violated U.S. laws and sanctions in supporting Cuba's communist regime, Fox News Digital has learned. foxnews.com/politics/feds-su…
amazing that this so-called “journalist” began his post saying he was “almost taken hostage,” then at no point did he describe almost being taken hostage
never seen such instantaneous self-discrediting. bravo, nick 👏🏼
🚨 I was almost taken hostage in Cuba...
I went to Cuba to document the humanitarian crisis and show life under 60+ years of communism and now amid the US blockade. Once I landed, they seized all my cameras except my iPhone and had intelligence agents following me all day until my security noticed their spies tailing us to the hotel where they waited all night for us to come down.
Under communism there is no free speech, and those who show the reality or speak up are imprisoned. Me going without a planned Cuban government guide nearly got me and my security taken hostage or imprisoned.
The situation in Cuba is much worse than anyone knows.
they’re calling it the most dork ass policy position of 2026
Marijuana today is much more potent than just ten or twenty years ago, leading to increased psychosis, anti-social behavior, and fatal car crashes. Arkansans don’t want more dangerous drugs obtained more easily. A change to marijuana’s drug classification is a step in the wrong direction.
Readers added context they thought people might want to know
Tom is lying - Opinion polls consistently show that Arkansans favor legalizing marijuana:
thv11.com/article/news/p…
ualrpublicradio.org/local-regional…
The Arkansas government is engaging in an active effort to subvert the will of its constituents by packing courts and changing ballot initiative thresholds:
mpp.org/states/arkansa…
frank cappello retweeted
A roomful of billionaires took up a collection to fund a blog that would make fun of college students, defend Israel, and patronize the sensibilities of not-very-bright but very rich boomers. One of those boomers then bought it for $150 million and also bought tiktok and much of the rest of the media.
Good for you, but please spare us the parade.
I can't explain how surreal it is to see a @TheFP billboard in Times Square is given this all started at a kitchen table....
frank cappello retweeted
Amazing that Dems have a stronger stance on Hasan Piker than the war on Iran.
frank cappello retweeted
You will laugh and laugh and laugh and then subscribe to zeteo.com/subscribe
Our fake Democratic Party consultant @heycappello is back, with his hilarious plan for the 2028 presidential primaries and a client hunt:
@HBO you should do a show called Meal Time With Bill Rawr. It's about a lion named Bill who eats a gazelle live every Friday night.
my only update to this pitch is that every time bill finishes eating he then blames the younger generation of lions for destroying all of jungle society even though they’re only like 35 years old
nothing says “we’re serious about combating antisemitism” than having the audience vote for their favorite antisemite a lá American Idol
2025 Antisemite of the Year top 3 finalists:
👉 Tucker Carlson
👉 Bryce Mitchell
👉 Stew Peters
Vote through December 19th and help determine the 2025 Antisemite of the Year.
stopantisemitism.org/asoty20…
“former candidate” in the bio lol
Zohran’s appointments just show how unserious and immature he really is. It’s like he is intentionally building a fright house filled with grifters, lobbyists and paid activists, all of whom agree with his anti-semitism, anti-private property, anti-public safety, anti-growth , anti-education and anti-opportunity stances. He isn’t even trying to give voice to any alternative viewpoints. It may look good on paper to the radical children in charge to have the entire left flank on zoom calls, but this is not how to run an effective government in the real world.
Extremism won’t work in NYC.
We can thank @GovKathyHochul @TishJames for this.
@OneCityRisingNY
subscribe to @zeteo_news if you enjoy news coverage that enrages Ted Cruz
frank cappello retweeted
NEW: We asked NYC voters to summarize the Democrats in one word. Their response? "Nothing."
But Zohran, AOC, Bernie: "They're offering something. They're not just running against the right."
New voters say @ZohranKMamdani has a real message, and that affordability hits home.
imagine paying $150 million to book kushner and witkoff
Watch the extended @60Minutes interview with @jaredkushner and @SteveWitkoff right here:
youtu.be/dNa6PcU1Ke0?si=S6bA…
frank cappello retweeted
"Here's a chance to tell her story in her words. And of course, launder her image and make a sh*t ton of money."
In the newest satirical video from Zeteo's @heycappello, the ghostwriter of Kamala Harris' new book shares his secrets for writing a bestselling political memoir.
