@maddcanada Virtual Candlelight Vigil #2020 #VirtualNCVID #NotOneMore

Choices. Actions. Consequences. We all have a role to play. Go vote.

This hurts to be a memory today, especially because it involves gratitude and being grateful. I loved seeing them smile because they knew they worked so hard and were so proud of themselves! My beautiful, beautiful boys. I am so grateful for them. Being their nanay was the best part of my life ever.

I am still here. Every year, this time of year is horrific and brutal. Survival is only remotely possible bc of the kindness of those who choose to surround me, who choose to walk with me through these agonizing weeks of the crash date to their burial date. Thank you everyone for your support and kindness. Thank you for the love and prayers. To those who made the physical journey to be here with me, you have no idea how grateful I am to you. Life without my children, without my family is - I refuse to sugar coat it- a fucking endless nightmare. Thank you to all the Fireflies who share their lights with me in my eternal darkness. I am still here, with You, because of You, zigzagging with me. With gratitude and appreciation, Jenn

Family fun. Date nights with my boys, all three of them. I miss the tapestry of our family so much. #NotOneMore

"Today is the day we bury my family. Ed's and my hopes for the future, our legacy and our dreams will be committed to the ground for eternity along with my father who was the "patriarch" of my family. Ed and I celebrated our 10th wedding anniversary looking at the caskets full of our broken and stolen dreams. But our day was supposed to have another beginning and I came across the video that shows it. Just over 2 months ago our children began rehearsing a dance that they were going to perform for us on Friday Oct 2 in the morning - our 10th wedding anniversary. Our life as a family was far from "picture perfect" but it was ours and it was our paradise. I came across this song called "Just Another Day In Paradise" and the kids wanted to dance to it. Every night at dinner we would pray and I would always ask for another day with the ones I love. Here is the only rehearsal I have on record but it shows the personalities of each of them. If you knew Harry please take note of far he had come by seeing how he dances and twirls. Milly giggles throughout as my beautiful Daniel directs his brother and sister. You can hear the exasperation in his voice when they don't always follow his direction and see how lovingly he helps to guide them. You will notice that Harry is in a dress, the truth is that for self help skills it was easier for him to be independent wearing a dress then if he wore pants. This was also the day he was able to successfully put on and take off his socks completely independently. Thank you for watching my children. All your love and prayers are always appreciated. God bless. Love, Jenn and Angel Ed"

11 yrs ago today it's almost time To bury my dreams made flesh & my heart I don't want to do this My kids have gone from my arms to my dads They'll sleep together forever in a colder, narrower bed I hate this so much I shouldn't have to do this Surely i will wake up now? Goodnight, cruel world I HATE you!

11 yrs ago today my anxiety was through the roof I know what tomorrow will bring I'm not ready I was sick all day I'm on my knees crying my heart out I'm scared I'm a mess My throat is raw I am not ready I know what tomorrow will bring I think I heard the final plans I said yes to them I know what tomorrow would bring I am not ready I can't bear the thought DAMN DRUNK DRIVER!!! This is not how our lives should be. #NotOneMore #Consequences #DontDrinkAndDrive

Felt so ill this morning. Woke up and reached out for my littles to snuggle with bc I am so cold and there are only empty cold beds. My heart is breaking over and over every day. #ConsequencesMatter #NotOneMore

Daniel was 7 when he beat both his Godfather and myself at Settlers of Catan. He was so so smart. I was so incredibly proud that he was able to out think us bc his Godfather and I didn't throw the game. No, Daniel won on his own merits. I can't even explain how proud of him I am. #proudnanayhere #missthemlikecrazy #mypreciousboy Daniel had the blue pieces.

Fishing with daddy. #MyLoves

A family fun day when I was pregnant with our little lady! We were so happy. Be still, my aching heart. #NotOneMore #DontDrinkAndDrive

11 yrs ago today it was our first family holiday without our family We didn't know what to do So many friends and strangers helped us in more ways then I can tell you I think I said thank you Today I still don't know what to do Friends and strangers are still walking with me Thank you for everything #NotOneMore

More finite memories of my beautiful life. I remember how much fun making and choosing these photos were with my boys. I wonder what antics for my cover and profile pics would we have come up with for today??? #ConsequencesMatter

My shoes are too tight but it doesn't matter because I have forgotten how to dance. 3 empty chairs always at my table bc of a drunk driver 4 empty chairs on family holidays Be safe Don't drive impaired!!! "Thanksgiving" 2026. #lifesucks #NotOneMore

My heart. #NotOneMore

Was this truly my life in 2014? My beautiful and fulfilled life feels like it was just a dream, especially when i compare how different it was to this hell i am living! Fucking drunk driver!! 11 yrs ago today this process was completed. I don't know full details because I can't bear to know them yet. I know 2 at a time but not who went together and who went alone. As their mom I feel like i should know...but i don't. I can't yet. I only have the end results. And now, because of the fire, I have shards left. Ed sleeps with his little urns, thank god. #mybabies #mybeautifulbabies #momfail #ihatethissomuch #whyisthisourlife #whywhywhy #notonemore

Pallbearers. Coffins. Hearses. These words in plural should not be associated with children. But they are associated with mine and I hate that. The only singular word i can assign to this day is funeral bc they had a joint one. I couldn't bear the thought of separate celebrations of life because to me those were reserved for the kinds of celebrations of life I loved...their birthday parties!! This is so wrong. So very wrong. Pallbearers, 20 pallbearers. Daniel was tall enough to need the same number as my dad. Each pallbearer was assigned a colour and their name written under that colour on Harry's prescription bag from Shoppers. Each did their best to find the colour and wear it. The guys worked together to fulfill my camo request for Daniel bc finding 6 camo anything was hard. They managed to do it. 11 yrs ago today hundreds of people joined us as we celebrated the lives of our beautiful family. The 20 brave pallbearers, dressed in each in our beloveds favourite colours, made a rainbow as they carried our precious ones to the next stage of their journey, leaving Ed and I behind. #ihatethis #iwantthemhome #broken This is part of the aftermath when you drive impaired. This is what moms like me are forced to do after you drive impaired. This is broken. Just stop it. STOP IT!!! #ihatemylife #whyisthisourlife #theyshouldbehere #imissthemsomuch #NOTONEMORE

11 yrs ago today I have to say goodbye forever soon I am not ready 20 pallbearers; 6 ea for dad and Daniel, 4 ea for Harry and Milly The pallbearers are colour coded bc I can't bear to see that word and my loves names on a list I write on a prescription bag of Harry's I have to kiss them goodnight one last time I am not ready Kind strangers have gone and now our loved ones join us to say goodbye I have to tuck them into bed one last time I am not ready I am not ready I am not ready OMB, now??? More time..please??? Please??? Now. Please??!? I am not ready!!! Whywhywhywhy?!??

4 of 4. I'm the only one left. You know, I used to have dreams. 21 years ago today Ed and I started our love story. We dreamed aloud together, turned those dreams into plans & goals 4 dreams turned into little people, 3 of whom we got to meet in this life. 11 yrs ago today we stood looking at the coffins that held our dreams, our little loves, after their senseless deaths. Now all that remains of our family is me. Ed, in honour of the country boy who married the pregnant city girl, I hope you are at peace. Our love story should not have ended this way. Yesterday it was me and my family. Today Or Tomorrow It could be yours. You could be me. 4 of 4. #NotOneMore #ConsequencesMatter

21 yrs ago tonight, I was so excited for tomorrow. I couldn't sleep. I was up till all hours with my friends finishing details for the start of my happily ever after. Now the start of our happily-ever-after is another painful, beartbreaking memory because I know what tomorrow will bring. So it's another night of tears. Fuck. #NotOneMore #ConsequencesMatter