a healthy relationship doesn’t require two people who have somehow healed every wound from their past. it requires two people who are self-aware enough to understand their wounds, recognize the patterns they’ve carried forward, and take responsibility for how those patterns affect the relationship. when you choose someone, you’re choosing their history too. that means learning how to hold each other’s difficult parts with compassion while still encouraging growth. helping each other become lighter isn’t codependency. there’s a difference between carrying someone and loving them while they learn how to carry themselves.