This is fake. Secretary of State of Illinois, NOT a secretary for Illinois, MOM! Duties include tumbling, organ harvesting, keepin' it real.
Illinois
Joined February 2012
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Remember, when getting a new ID, you will first receive a paper copy at the DMV. That copy will be valid until the plastic ID arrives in the mail. Also remember, you MUST eat the paper copy immediately after receiving the plastic copy. I like mine with a little garlic salt!
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You may or may not cry while eating your paper ID. Though I may not like, I have no control over that specific issue. #IllinoisLawIsILL
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Life is like my homemade McRib™ sandwich: hard to make, messy, satisfying, onion bun – at Chicago, IL
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People often ask me, what my favorite music is? The answer: anything off "Songs to Tumble To" which is a mix CD I made 7 years ago. – at Chicago, IL
bring back nerds blizzards please @DairyQueen! Also @twitter please make this go viral! Thanks to both! – at Chicago, IL
You expect me to go on a cruise by myself?? Gotta find that plus one somehow, baby! #IslandLiving teapaw.org/kyleluvsew/status/8779…
Calling the Secretary of State (@jessewhiteIL) and being spammed by Bahama’s Cruises before support. So unprofessional.
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People often ask "Jesse, what's your favorite organ?" I smirk and say "Pipe organ, of course!" Then I yank out their heart, Indy Jones style – at Chicago, IL
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Lets imagine, just for a minute, that the Seal of the State of Illinois was... wait for it... AN ACTUAL SEAL! LIKE THE ANIMAL! – at Chicago, IL
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Some might disagree, but gotta say, my homemade "Hint of Lime™" chips are just as good as the store bought. Sorry to be controversial. – at Chicago, IL
Can somebody tell me if I'm still Secretary of State of IL? #thanks – at Chicago, IL
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Safe Driving Tip #2168: When you're driving in the rain, open your sunroof and people won't be able to tell that you're crying. #WetFace
Has anyone ever noticed my name is an anagram for "Eh Wise Jets"... Am I secretly a military plane that gained sentience?!?! #hardtruths
I'll make the DMV faster as soon as someone tells me what DMV stands for! #acronymsarenotforme
It's totally normal to spend 15 years at the same job without getting promoted, right? And no, it's not because I'm lazy, Mom! #CmonMom
Thanks everyone. Now I get to work for 4 me years. Hooray. #sarcastic #moremoney4mcribs – at Chicago, IL
Let me know if you voted today! And also where! And also if they're open late for guys who forgot! And also the refreshment situation!
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Safe driving tip #64: dogs cannot operate motorized vehicles in Illinois. Not even Air Bud.