#FreeBESIGYE #FreeMABIRIZI

The IRS decided to audit Grandpa and summoned him to the IRS office. The auditor wasn’t surprised when Grandpa showed up accompanied by his attorney. The auditor began, “Well, sir, you appear to have an extravagant lifestyle despite having no full-time employment. You explain this by claiming that you make your money gambling. I’m not sure the IRS finds that particularly believable.” “I’m a great gambler, and I can prove it,” Grandpa replied. “How about a demonstration?” The auditor thought for a moment and said, “Okay. Go ahead.” Grandpa said, “I’ll bet you $1,000 that I can bite my own eye.” The auditor considered the proposition and said, “It’s a bet.” Grandpa removed his glass eye and bit it. The auditor’s jaw dropped. Grandpa continued, “Now, I’ll bet you $2,000 that I can bite my other eye.” The auditor could clearly see that Grandpa wasn’t blind, so he eagerly accepted the bet. Grandpa removed his dentures and bit his good eye. The stunned auditor realized he’d just lost $3,000, with Grandpa’s attorney there as a witness. He was starting to get nervous. “Want to go double or nothing?” Grandpa asked. “I’ll bet you $6,000 that I can stand on one side of your desk, pee into the wastebasket on the other side, and not get a single drop anywhere in between.” Having been burned twice, the auditor was cautious. But after carefully considering the distance, he decided there was no way the old man could pull off such a stunt. He accepted the bet. Grandpa stood beside the desk, unzipped his pants, and gave it his best shot. But despite straining mightily, he couldn’t get the stream anywhere near the wastebasket. Instead, he ended up urinating all over the auditor’s desk. The auditor leaped with joy, realizing he’d just turned a $3,000 loss into a $3,000 win. Meanwhile, Grandpa’s attorney groaned and buried his face in his hands. “Are you okay?” the auditor asked. “Not really,” the attorney replied. “This morning, when Grandpa told me he’d been summoned for an audit, he bet me $25,000 that he could come in here, piss all over your desk, and you’d be happy about it.”

Bro has accepted and given up on single mothers without force. Mama Nasiwa yabikozze 😭😭😂😂😂

Married men are like government vehicles 🚗😁😂😂🙌

This Priest Nails It!

H.E General Muhoozi Kainerugaba Museveni, Vice President of the Republic of Uganda. 📷 @UgandaMediaCent Cr. @kasujja

🚨 ELON MUSK EXPLAINS WHY YOU SHOULD NEVER CHARGE AN EV TO 100% The last 20% is not a small ask. “Getting from 80 to 100 takes about as much time as getting from 0 to 80.” It’s the opposite of how people fuel a gasoline car. “The lithium ions are trying to find a parking space. When the parking lot’s empty, they can zip right in. As the parking lot gets full, just like trying to find a parking space at a mall, you have to hunt around for a spot.” So on a road trip the rule flips. “You actually want to charge to about 80%, and then run it down all the way to 10%, or less.”

In week one, Dr. Karanja(lecturer) told our whole class: "I don't take attendance. Come for the CATs and the exam, the rest is your business." Nobody complained. I used the free time to hustle for rent. I wrote every CAT and scored 68 in the exam. When results came out, next to..

A lady identified as Edna Jay is walking around with a permanent smile after successfully convincing her husband of many years to undergo the famous circumnavigation cut. Edna Jay took to social media to celebrate after escorting her 46-year-old husband Peter Mwendah to hospital for circumcision. Peter reportedly surrendered his precious equipment to the surgeons after more than 15 years of Mareej. Apparently, Edna had married her first boyfriend, meaning she had been operating with the factory settings for all those years without knowing what the upgraded version of makagare had to offer. After the much awaited crankshaft grinding and removal of the excess foreskin, the bald headed python is finally preparing to enter the wet cracks of shimo la tewa without a mboshori covering the sweetness. Peter has officially moved from the kivesee department to now the hall of men. Edna meanwhile is eagerly waiting for the system to reboot and normal operations to resume. She's expecting an unlimited supply of high voltage electricity without an iota of blackouts now that the transformer has undergone a full shaft replacement. Kama kawa sisi walala hoii hatuna maoni, Letu Jicho tu.👀

The investigation ended the moment the army was mentioned...🤣🤣🤣

Instead of paying the ransom for his kidnapped son, he used it to place a bounty on the kidnapper

A wife came home to find her husband having coffee with another woman. Before she could scream he said, “Relax, she’s here to see you. Meet Carole.” “She’s married to your boyfriend.”

"They told me the same thing last week," he said. "Third wash, gate stayed down." I held up my phone next to the kiosk. The sign said "Unlimited." The screen said "3 per week." Both couldn't be true. A teenager in a vest came out of the booth, looked at the sign, then at the screen. "The sign's from the old plan," he said quietly. "We changed it last month." I asked, "Did anyone tell members?" He said, "I'll ask my manager." He lifted the gate for both of us. On my way out, I saw him tape a handwritten note over the sign: "Limit: 3 per week." The man in the line caught up to me at the exit. "I've been paying for 'unlimited' for six months." I said, "Check what you signed." He laughed. "I'm checking it in the car." Fiction, but have you ever found out "unlimited" had a limit? (A short story. Fiction.)

Who's Pastor is this! He's preaching the Gospel.

This guy needs to differentiate between nationality and ethnicity better. Ethnically British or English people are more British in a cultural sense because the UK is their ancestral homeland and they created the culture

Fascinating. This girl really didn’t think this through.