Summer Break Me: "didn't get my afternoon nap... just gonna lay down for a bit..."
[Wakes up 13 hours later on my couch]
Student 1: "what if Ms Gordon was in a coma and we are all just her servants"?
Student 2: "Shutup. It's too early for an existential crisis"
Senior 1: "Are you going to watch the new Power Rangers movie?"
Senior 2: "No. It's too progressive"
Me: 🤦🏻♀️
Going to the park with doxies is a great way to meet new people.
I've never had to apologize to so many men for my dogs trying to bite them.
"She's the superhero Dallas needs, but doesn't deserve" #batdog… instagram.com/p/BRlvJZcjtO3h…
I have rightly earned this reputation at work #queenofhappyhour instagram.com/p/BQdjm2UDLiOU…
Econ lecture
Me: example, how do I incentivize you to answer questions?
Answer expected: extra credit
Answer received: the room smells good
Laura Gordon retweeted
Finding these Bowling Green Massacre jokes to be a little too soon. Out of respect, we should wait until it takes place.
so far I have dealt with crying, cleaning up puke, & picking up toys scattered everywhere.
Parenting dogs is real work, I tell ya.
Laura Gordon retweeted
Sean Spicer is telling about as much truth at these WH press briefings as I am when my doctor asks me how many drinks I have per week.
Student: are we beefing with North Korea?
Me: 👍
S: so are we also porking with them?
Me: 😳
S: what? What's porking?
Me: 😑