A man calls 911… “Yes, Sir. What's your emergency?” “I'm calling to report my neighbor, Billy Smith. He’s hiding drugs inside his firewood.” “Thank you very much for the call, sir.” The next day, the police descend on Billy’s house. They search the shed where the firewood is stored. Using axes, they bust open every single log. No drugs found - just a huge mess. They swore at Billy and left. Later that day, the phone rings at Billy’s house... “Hey Billy Bob! Did the police come?” “Yeah!” “Did they chop up your firewood?” “Yep.” “Happy Birthday, buddy.”