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MucusandCheese

@markdoyle100

Ye/Upon/Thus//Thine

 Jerusalem Cruiser
Joined March 2012
  • Tweets2.9K
  • Following264
  • Followers158
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solemnly* "I pray it never comes to this" [me packing a protein bar into my carryon]
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MucusandCheese retweeted
just josh Pray 😥 (@_joshpray) profile picture
just josh Pray 😥
@_joshprayOct 18
MIAMI IS #1… THE VILLAIN WON. 😭🏈 Somebody get my priest in the phone
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Nothing can prepare you to see Dave Portnoy run @stoolpresidente
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The Karen Read trial is bananas but the real crime is the disgusting Boston accent being pushed onto the ears of innocent Americans #FreeKarenRead
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You’re doom scrolling on Instagram. I’m doom strolling at Costco. We are not the same.
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Finally some content we can sink our teeth into
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I didn’t know God's plan for me would involve so much time browsing LinkedIn begging for employment
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I would probably use my last breath to say something nobody would want to hear or understand or remember
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How embarrassing to win a medal in pole vaulting now
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What happened nutritionally over the past three days can never be undone
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Female Utahn author: “His eyes were Diet Coke brown. His skin, Stanley tan.”
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Last night we let the ambien do the talking
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old people be like "elbows off the table that's rude." then tell you that you look fatter than usual
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normalize giving wrong directions to ugly people
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my summer pannus is coming in nicely
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Is Beauty and the Beast a story about catfishing? Now THAT’S a tale as old as time
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Remember how the #metoo movement swept the nation then proceeded to take down exactly one person
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Kamala might somehow be more embarrassing to our country than walking dead Joe!
RNC Research (@RNCResearch) profile pictureRNC Research
@RNCResearch5 Apr 2024
Sports Fan Kamala Harris claims the NCAA women's basketball tournament was "not allowed to have brackets until 2022." As usual, she is wrong.
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I know what I need to do but I don’t know if I have the stimulants to do it
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Finally some closure @RealChalamet @Zendaya #dune #Dune2
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