number one guy (@mistakewizard) header
number one guy (@mistakewizard) profile picture

number one guy

@mistakewizard

i eschewed the tongs deliberately

Joined January 2017
  • Tweets35.9K
  • Following1.1K
  • Followers872
3.7KMedia
Photo by number one guy (@mistakewizard)Photo by number one guy (@mistakewizard)Photo by number one guy (@mistakewizard)Photo by number one guy (@mistakewizard)Photo by number one guy (@mistakewizard)Photo by number one guy (@mistakewizard)Photo by number one guy (@mistakewizard)Photo by number one guy (@mistakewizard)Photo by number one guy (@mistakewizard)Photo by number one guy (@mistakewizard)
It’s too late. Mentally, I’ve already cast you as the hysterical Father Barre and myself as the eternally composed and equanimous Father Grandier.
Image from Maul Atreides 🇮🇪 42/50 📚 Breaking Bad rewatch! (@theweirdinggay)
5
611
14
4,777
58,721
You will scream.
Image from Warner Bros. Clockwork (@clockwork_wb)
Image from Warner Bros. Clockwork (@clockwork_wb)
76
478
232
5,167
256,781
number one guy retweeted
#RingoStarr (@ringostarrmusic) profile picture
#RingoStarr
@ringostarrmusicOct 30
Hanging out with my bony friend, peace and love
Image from #RingoStarr (@ringostarrmusic)
148
4,037
222
26,852
378,130
number one guy retweeted
Dmytro Tyshenko (@dima_ti1) profile picture
Dmytro Tyshenko@dima_ti1Sep 22
Replying to @stardusthome
They don't know I've made my mind a sunless space
Image from Dmytro Tyshenko (@dima_ti1)
2
4
186
6,513
number one guy retweeted
victor’s airpods (@tequila__KT) profile picture
victor’s airpods@tequila__KTSep 14
dialectical thinkers ONLY
1
2
51
number one guy retweeted
Timo Tjahjanto (@Timobros) profile picture
Timo Tjahjanto@TimobrosAug 29
Fair, but why does the baby crawl upwards like the dead kid in Trainspotting.
Alex Patrascu (@maxescu) profile pictureAlex Patrascu
@maxescuAug 28
The anti-AI crowd doesn't understand two things: 1. How to be civil on social media 2. You can generate absolutely anything with AI
8
13
282
16,730
number one guy retweeted
🔎Al🔍 (@SweatieAngle) profile picture
🔎Al🔍@SweatieAngleAug 18
she’s performing at the top 1% of the white girl game here - this must be like how men feel when someone who should have retired comes back for one last triumphant season in sports, like even rooting against her team it’s still incredible to see a master athlete play
Nancy Mace (@NancyMace) profile pictureNancy Mace
@NancyMaceAug 17
Thoughts and prayers to all those affected by my sleeves. Made the mistake of opening my social media this afternoon. Some of yall are OUT OF CONTROL. My biceps should NOT be a news story. We have more important things to worry about. Goodness. And God Bless America. 🙏🇺🇸
Image from Nancy Mace (@NancyMace)
25
20
1
824
27,456
can’t stop watching it
abby☃️MERRY CHRISTMAS🍉 (@abbywillwrite) profile pictureabby☃️MERRY CHRISTMAS🍉@abbywillwriteAug 15
dude i was just crying laughing to that video of the polar bear dancing at the daycare
152
4,609
304
62,500
2,341,142
Image from passed out drunk at the steamboat Arabia museum (@GarlicCorgi)
Jose Canseco (@JoseCanseco) profile pictureJose Canseco
@JoseCansecoAug 14
Sit.\nTing here at the airport , watching everybody hustle , and move around like a bunch of ants stressed out just to pay taxes to pay our government , which is filled with pedophiles and corrupt individuals
16
343
5,755
247,296
number one guy retweeted
Dok (@Dok845) profile picture
Dok@Dok845Aug 15
Making the rounds again
Dok (@Dok845) profile pictureDok@Dok84521 Jul 2025
Every time AOC gets caught out she starts talking like this
3
17
433
63,540
number one guy retweeted
skeletonheads (@skeletonheads) profile picture
skeletonheads
@skeletonheadsAug 11
74
212
152
3,836
1,621,149
number one guy retweeted
Anung Un Drama (@spaceghost) profile picture
Anung Un Drama
@spaceghostAug 9
Robert California’s dialogue fitting flawlessly with Ultron’s characterization is making me cry laugh
Anung Un Drama (@spaceghost) profile pictureAnung Un Drama
@spaceghostAug 9
Does Vision have a dick, did Ultron give him a schlong
31
167
8
2,503
152,477
number one guy retweeted
just bepie (@newBepie) profile picture
just bepie@newBepieJul 24
CBS News (@CBSNews) profile pictureCBS News
@CBSNewsJul 23
1.6 million eggs recalled at Kroger and other stores over salmonella risk, FDA says. cbsn.ws/4vJG8mw
1.6 million cartons of eggs recalled at Kroger and other stores over salmonella risk, FDA says

1.6 million cartons of eggs recalled at Kroger and other stores over salmonella risk, FDA says

The recall affects white-shell and cage-free eggs sold under multiple grocery brands in six states. No illnesses have been reported.

cbsnews.com
13
596
11
3,401
151,483
number one guy retweeted
Jimmy (@jimmmyro) profile picture
Jimmy@jimmmyroJul 21
The average tweet about Carrie Bradshaw
8
139
7
2,810
76,683
number one guy retweeted
PointlessHub (@HubPointless) profile picture
PointlessHub@HubPointlessJul 21
WAV Archive (@WAVArchive) profile pictureWAV Archive
@WAVArchiveJul 20
Animal I Have Become — Three Days Grace (2006)
49
3,065
15
28,236
634,382
number one guy retweeted
Good Faces (@good_faces_bot) profile picture
Good Faces@good_faces_botJul 20
Image from Good Faces (@good_faces_bot)
18
373
9
3,005
45,330
number one guy retweeted
demi adejuyigbe (@electrolemon) profile picture
demi adejuyigbe@electrolemonJul 14
Pain & Gain (2013) / Sex and the City (2003)
Image from demi adejuyigbe (@electrolemon)
Image from demi adejuyigbe (@electrolemon)
9
38
1
1,694
53,327
number one guy retweeted
LateNighter (@latenightercom) profile picture
LateNighter
@latenightercomJul 6
John Oliver’s third—and final—day on General Hospital is off to a rip-roaring start. Consider him fully initiated.
130
1,175
438
19,248
4,997,341
number one guy retweeted
ettingermentum (@ettingermentum) profile picture
ettingermentum
@ettingermentumJul 7
They wanted us dead in the fucking dirt man
40
48
4
2,527
83,963
number one guy retweeted
Thomas (@TKerouac76) profile picture
Thomas@TKerouac76Jul 5
Image from Thomas (@TKerouac76)
10
373
13
4,263
70,723
Load more