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JΛMΞSH

@monkbernardo

Former bartender. Occasional writer. Made in OKC. Studied at Nebraska, OU. Conservatives are ideological terrorists. सदा मस्त रहो।

 OKC, New Delhi
solo.to/monkbernardo
Joined April 2009
  • Tweets35.9K
  • Following1.1K
  • Followers615
3.2KMedia
Photo by JΛMΞSH (@monkbernardo)Photo by JΛMΞSH (@monkbernardo)Photo by JΛMΞSH (@monkbernardo)Photo by JΛMΞSH (@monkbernardo)Photo by JΛMΞSH (@monkbernardo)Photo by JΛMΞSH (@monkbernardo)Photo by JΛMΞSH (@monkbernardo)Photo by JΛMΞSH (@monkbernardo)Photo by JΛMΞSH (@monkbernardo)Photo by JΛMΞSH (@monkbernardo)
I am shuttering this account (but won’t be deleting in the event Emerald Mines sells to someone reasonable someday), so if you’re trying to reach me here, don’t.
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I got to meet Arturo. He got to live his best doggie life every single day, and what Jon managed to do for him really felt like magic. We’re fortunate that Jon is willingly sharing that magic. Check it out. 🧵
Jon Willbanks (e/acc) (@jonwillbanks) profile pictureJon Willbanks (e/acc)
@jonwillbanks24 Jun 2025
Most large dogs like mine live 10-12 years. I helped mine live to nearly 17 in perfect health. It wasn't luck or surgery. Here's the story of how I did it:
Image from Jon Willbanks (e/acc) (@jonwillbanks)
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This is the kind of mesmerizing content you’re missing out on over at the other app. 🧵 – at Oklahoma City, OK
Image from JΛMΞSH (@monkbernardo)
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"I love the U.S... but that ain't the world!" ❌ Noah Lyles throws shade at the NBA's 'world champions' 🏀👀
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“DO YOU KNOW SOMEBODY NAMED RICO?” – at Toronto, Ontario
Image from Mike Beauvais (@MikeBeauvais)
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The SNL "Blind Side" spoof is looking wildly accurate right about now:
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I finally realized why the Elon vs Zuckerberg fight seemed so familiar:
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I got to see my 🐐, @jimmyeatworld, last night. They’ve been a band for 30!!! years, and I’ve been along for the ride for 22 of those. Seeing them last night took me down a road of reflection that is difficult to put into words, but I can only say how grateful I am for the music. – at Oklahoma City, OK
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You know shit is getting serious when Lil Sebastian shows up to the picket. #SAGAFTRAstrong #wgastrong
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I disagree
2000s (@PopCulture2000s) profile picture2000s
@PopCulture2000s1 Aug 2023
there’s no summer song this year 💀
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As of today, I’m 250 days sober. 🙏🏻 – at Oklahoma City, OK
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Welp. Hello, Oklahoma. I *really* didn’t want to see you again so soon, but I rarely get what I want these days, so… hi. – at Oklahoma City, OK
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Sorry, but I’m black-listing Chicago. I am now willing to pay several hundred dollars more per trip simply to avoid it. – at Rosemont, IL
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Hey @SheaSerrano, you gonna hop over to any Twitter alts (🧵) or will you be going down with the ship here?
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The guy next to me on this flight has not stopped moving in *four hours.* I don’t know whether to pity him or murder him.
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Leaving never ever remotely gets easier. – at Indira Gandhi International Airport, New Delhi
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Do I agree with Mitch McConnell on everything? No. But is he a human who deserves our respect as he recovers? Hard no.
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steven adams looks like his job is beach
Image from Molly Morrison (@mollyhannahm)
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OK, I'm gonna do this. Here's an ongoing thread of every major and stupidly minor crazy thing that Barbenheimer did at the box office this weekend.
Image from Jonathan (@jonathanmb32)
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Sure, there were obviously *stellar* performances by basically every single person in it, but don’t y’all sleep on Gary Oldman as Harry Truman. Five minutes of blistering brilliance. #Oppenheimer – at New Delhi, India
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