ally π–Œπ–†π–™π–”π–— πŸŠπŸ§‘β€πŸ³πŸ•πŸ³οΈβ€πŸŒˆ (@notacroc) header
ally π–Œπ–†π–™π–”π–— πŸŠπŸ§‘β€πŸ³πŸ•πŸ³οΈβ€πŸŒˆ (@notacroc) profile picture

ally π–Œπ–†π–™π–”π–— πŸŠπŸ§‘β€πŸ³πŸ•πŸ³οΈβ€πŸŒˆ

@notacroc

cry me a table, Linda

 Chicago, IL
Joined October 2015
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  • Following728
  • Followers13.6K
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Photo by ally π–Œπ–†π–™π–”π–— πŸŠπŸ§‘β€πŸ³πŸ•πŸ³οΈβ€πŸŒˆ (@notacroc)Photo by ally π–Œπ–†π–™π–”π–— πŸŠπŸ§‘β€πŸ³πŸ•πŸ³οΈβ€πŸŒˆ (@notacroc)Photo by ally π–Œπ–†π–™π–”π–— πŸŠπŸ§‘β€πŸ³πŸ•πŸ³οΈβ€πŸŒˆ (@notacroc)Photo by ally π–Œπ–†π–™π–”π–— πŸŠπŸ§‘β€πŸ³πŸ•πŸ³οΈβ€πŸŒˆ (@notacroc)Photo by ally π–Œπ–†π–™π–”π–— πŸŠπŸ§‘β€πŸ³πŸ•πŸ³οΈβ€πŸŒˆ (@notacroc)Photo by ally π–Œπ–†π–™π–”π–— πŸŠπŸ§‘β€πŸ³πŸ•πŸ³οΈβ€πŸŒˆ (@notacroc)Photo by ally π–Œπ–†π–™π–”π–— πŸŠπŸ§‘β€πŸ³πŸ•πŸ³οΈβ€πŸŒˆ (@notacroc)Photo by ally π–Œπ–†π–™π–”π–— πŸŠπŸ§‘β€πŸ³πŸ•πŸ³οΈβ€πŸŒˆ (@notacroc)Photo by ally π–Œπ–†π–™π–”π–— πŸŠπŸ§‘β€πŸ³πŸ•πŸ³οΈβ€πŸŒˆ (@notacroc)Photo by ally π–Œπ–†π–™π–”π–— πŸŠπŸ§‘β€πŸ³πŸ•πŸ³οΈβ€πŸŒˆ (@notacroc)
[alternate universe where jesus christ's name was jeffy spaghetti] ME: *hears some horrible news* jeffy spaghetti
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ally π–Œπ–†π–™π–”π–— πŸŠπŸ§‘β€πŸ³πŸ•πŸ³οΈβ€πŸŒˆ retweeted
brent (@murrman5) profile picture
brent@murrman51 Oct 2019
[me telling my story how I survived a plane crash and lived on a deserted island for a year] it was crazy [friend who once got a text from me where I accidentally called the grinch the grink] was the grink there?
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ally π–Œπ–†π–™π–”π–— πŸŠπŸ§‘β€πŸ³πŸ•πŸ³οΈβ€πŸŒˆ retweeted
mr. joshua (@pants) profile picture
mr. joshua
@pants5 Oct 2025
Image from mr. joshua (@pants)
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ally π–Œπ–†π–™π–”π–— πŸŠπŸ§‘β€πŸ³πŸ•πŸ³οΈβ€πŸŒˆ retweeted
brent (@murrman5) profile picture
brent@murrman514 Jan 2015
"no rapping tonight" why? "you rap about patrick swayze everytime, it's embarrassing" ok [after one beer] uh oh y'all it's gettin kinda hazy
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ally π–Œπ–†π–™π–”π–— πŸŠπŸ§‘β€πŸ³πŸ•πŸ³οΈβ€πŸŒˆ retweeted
ally π–Œπ–†π–™π–”π–— πŸŠπŸ§‘β€πŸ³πŸ•πŸ³οΈβ€πŸŒˆ (@notacroc) profile picture
ally π–Œπ–†π–™π–”π–— πŸŠπŸ§‘β€πŸ³πŸ•πŸ³οΈβ€πŸŒˆ@notacroc6 Sep 2019
Friend: wanna play basketball later? Me: [has never played basketball before] sure Friend: i'll bring the ball Me: [nervous] ok cool [Later] Me: [pulls up with a basketball hoop strapped to the roof of my car] sorry I'm late
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mr. joshua (@pants) profile picture
mr. joshua
@pants17 Sep 2024
Image from mr. joshua (@pants)
Image from mr. joshua (@pants)
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Mike Migdall (@ItsMigdallTime) profile picture
Mike Migdall@ItsMigdallTime26 Dec 2022
Benoit Blanc talking to detective Pikachu in knives out 3: baw gawd you are some kind of yellow rodent ... mHmmm...
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Big skippy baby
Image from ally π–Œπ–†π–™π–”π–— πŸŠπŸ§‘β€πŸ³πŸ•πŸ³οΈβ€πŸŒˆ (@notacroc)
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The Golden Sir (@screaminbutcalm) profile picture
The Golden Sir@screaminbutcalm12 Mar 2019
Me sowing: Haha fuck yeah!!! Yes!! Me reaping: Well this fucking sucks. What the fuck.
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pat tobin (@tastefactory) profile picture
pat tobin@tastefactory3 Oct 2015
YANKEE DOODLE: *sticks feather in his cap* This is called macaroni YANKEE DOODLE'S FRIEND: Ok, cool. Listen man, everybody's worried about u
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Good Kyle (@KyleMcDowell86) profile picture
Good Kyle@KyleMcDowell8613 May 2015
[Me to the second baseman after I slide into 2nd] Make sure u separate plastics & food waste [Coach from dugout] NOT THAT KIND OF TRASH TALK
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ally π–Œπ–†π–™π–”π–— πŸŠπŸ§‘β€πŸ³πŸ•πŸ³οΈβ€πŸŒˆ retweeted
Clint Stevens (@clintstevensTV) profile picture
Clint Stevens
@clintstevensTV31 Mar 2024
Car manufacturers need to work on standardized wifi msging between nearby cars, im thinking something like pictochat on the DS, or maybe mariokart preset messages. Cut someone off, then send them a β€œim using tilt-controls!” over their radio.
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Andrew Nadeau (@TheAndrewNadeau) profile picture
Andrew Nadeau
@TheAndrewNadeau24 Jul 2019
[First sunset] HIM: HER: HIM: HER: HIM: HER: HIM: Is that… you think that’s a problem?
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It's once again the day of pi
Image from ally π–Œπ–†π–™π–”π–— πŸŠπŸ§‘β€πŸ³πŸ•πŸ³οΈβ€πŸŒˆ (@notacroc)
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Just the sweetest
Image from ally π–Œπ–†π–™π–”π–— πŸŠπŸ§‘β€πŸ³πŸ•πŸ³οΈβ€πŸŒˆ (@notacroc)
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mr. joshua (@pants) profile picture
mr. joshua
@pants29 Feb 2024
Image from mr. joshua (@pants)
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My second @pants 🧴🧴
Image from ally π–Œπ–†π–™π–”π–— πŸŠπŸ§‘β€πŸ³πŸ•πŸ³οΈβ€πŸŒˆ (@notacroc)
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Not a concern in the world other than her tongue fitting in her mouth – at Chicago, IL
Image from ally π–Œπ–†π–™π–”π–— πŸŠπŸ§‘β€πŸ³πŸ•πŸ³οΈβ€πŸŒˆ (@notacroc)
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🟑 – at Chicago, IL
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ally π–Œπ–†π–™π–”π–— πŸŠπŸ§‘β€πŸ³πŸ•πŸ³οΈβ€πŸŒˆ (@notacroc) profile picture
ally π–Œπ–†π–™π–”π–— πŸŠπŸ§‘β€πŸ³πŸ•πŸ³οΈβ€πŸŒˆ@notacroc7 Nov 2016
C3PO's full name is charles post office post office post office
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