orbito--

I did some research and it turns out my penis is normal sized

oh cool I'm hot again

can't think of anything to say but moo. maybe this is how cows feel

upcoming blogpost: "1-on-1 Frames for Good and Evil"

a lot of my self worth is tied up in being funny right now

I don't fear pain, I fear like a big truck with like a gun on it or something

My mission is to avenge my martial arts master and bring technical solutions into reality through robust software practices and to be killed by a bobcat

dialectical I'm sorry I hurt you

get a girl who can do all four (identity, location, time, situation)

that's what happens when you don't invite me to things - people get herpes

this email could have been a hug

don't everybody cum at once

putting handwritten notes in my girlfriend's sandwiches that say "I love youu"

which happens sometimes, specifically now

me, on mile 3150 of our cross-country road trip: "hot.... dog? How fascinating. Quincy! Write that down!" gf: "I think I gave you too much Modafinil"

people don't like me anymore anyway so I'm just going to do bits about jellybeans

tragic flaws nooooo

the bad news is that this is the ocean

my gf, on the phone: "yes bubbe, we flew into north carolina, then drove up to virginia to see his parents, and now we're visiting with our family" me, whispering: ("if you're talking about someone else I'm going to kill myself")