new bio coming when I can think of a good one. I love sport, music, self-deprecation, bad wordplay, and good storytelling.

London, United Kingdom
Joined July 2009
You Know What They Do To Guys Like Us In Dallas County District Court
2
688
4,391
39,811
Samuel Draper retweeted
JESUS H CHRIST
2
16
300
3,725
🇬🇧 🏈 “Such were the size constraints of the clubs’ stadiums in the mid-90s that the NFL goalposts [for the London Monarchs American football team] stood within the stands at each end of Stamford Bridge…” - had to actually look it up, wow! 😳
Chelsea and Tottenham, and a tale of two stadiums #cfc #thfc 🔵 Mind the (gate revenue) gap ⚪️ Drawing level with Beyoncé 🔵 The CPO's "vital" role ⚪️ Wembley warning 🔵 70,000-plus target ⚪️ Setting records telegraph.co.uk/football/202…
9
18
325
88,849
Samuel Draper retweeted
The first 13 seconds are plain ol' normal good announcing. The last 4 seconds might be the most insane left turn I've ever heard.
Announcers always find a way to say the craziest stuff when a 19 year old college kid is having the greatest day of their career
9
143
8
3,621
263,577
Somewhere there’s a fourth tier water polo match being played on turf.
🚨🇪🇸 A game in the 4th division of Spanish football between Peña Deportiva and UCAM Murcia CF was suspended due to heavy rain. The pitch was flooded. ☔️❌
44
Samuel Draper retweeted
Gracias a todos por los mensajes , la operacion fue bien. Lo mas importante es que ganamos y con arco en 0 En unas semanas volvemos ya 🫶🏽
4,097
10,734
609
158,513
1,544,745
Samuel Draper retweeted
Your mam at a Coldplay gig
🚨 𝗡𝗘𝗪: Digital yellow and red cards were used during the match between Nacional and Rentistas in the Copa Uruguay. Instead of traditional cards, the referee used an electronic device to display bookings and send-offs. An innovation in football!
1
76
2,530
52,211
When #Scrubs cleverly used a reoccurring character (Dr Briggs played by Elizabeth Banks) in their intro to change an error in their intro 5 seasons in. ❤️❤️
i love when shows change the intro for one episode cuz of smt that happens in the plot
6
152
1
4,651
375,059
I’ve never seen synchronised F1 before, but now I want more of it.
Contact between the two McLarens! 🤯 Norris tried a move and tapped his team mate #F1Sprint #SingaporeGP | LAP 20/20
73
Samuel Draper retweeted
That Gazza goal vs Scotland is now further from today than Geoff Hurst’s World Cup winner was from Euro 96. Yes. You're old.
43
204
34
1,674
105,864
Samuel Draper retweeted
The composer George Fenton has died at the age of 76. His music included Blue Planet, Planet Earth and multiple movies - Baftas + Emmys and received five Oscar nominations. He composed BBC TV news theme tunes including the memorable Newsnight music.
36
261
41
787
94,227
80% of the children who accepted Wonka's Golden Ticket died
297
3,597
61
39,315
369,812
Those who are arrested tonight will be required to listen to Taylor Swift's new songs on repeat.
1,709
7,120
1,872
101,183
4,563,363
This quoted post is unavailable.
9
232
6
2,194
55,823
This isn’t the first time Katie McCabe has worn Chelsea socks in this derby
1
22
419
6,543
Samuel Draper retweeted
Oh look it’s Katie McCabe’s favourite Chelsea player
2
3
50
1,485
27
497
11
11,821
143,386
Samuel Draper retweeted
The Pittsburgh Steelers Bring Out The Heinz and Push Away The Bijan Mustard
5
90
2
606
8,157
3
639
45
3,392
162,102