@Dayscd

25 year old comedian from Minnesota the state @vdays

 Minneapolis, MN
instagram.com/drosand
Joined December 2014
  • Tweets26K
  • Following1.8K
  • Followers11.6K
3.6KMedia
worst day of my fucking life
DiscussingFilm
@DiscussingFilm17 May 2024
Young Sheldon has ended.
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SpongeBob ‘The Dangerous Pedophile’ SquarePants
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If poop was money I’d be a hundred million gazillionaire
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lowkey i'd let santa claws fuck on me
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days retweeted
lewis@Lewiswbt1Oct 24
I can't explain it but 8pm, the number 437926286537021, my chiropodist's doberman, the Iberian peninsula and the atavistic nature of vestigial tails in humans have the same energy. and Thursday
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Weed before beer, youre in the clear. Beer before pot.. uhhh.. my uncle's hot. No
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Apparently Ethan and Hila K. have news for the public. Apparently they have ended their marriage due to a lack of faithfulness. Apparently.
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Sponegebob makes money from his job at the krusty crab
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Well there goes my couples costume idea to do Ethan and Hila for Halloween... Just great...
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He’s a constipated detective.. No shit Sherlock.
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jill@littlefuckyOct 23
New episode of my show comin out in one week from today with amazing band of all time @wishy !!! Subscribe to our YouTube channel to watch more fucking crap like this youtube.com/@jillshouseofroc…
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Ebenezer
@ebenezermovieOct 22
Ebenezer Scrooge is now on @venmo. Think he’s feeling generous? 💰 Send a request: venmo.com/u/EBENEZERmovie
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Nobody else get a haircut until we can figure out what’s going on
Marlow Stern
@MarlowNYCOct 22
within 29 minutes of each other
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My Letterboxd movie review of You Can See Everything the The Movie
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The sexual nerd pushes his glasses up with his tongue
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days retweeted
jos@josiahhughesOct 22
me: le one "you can see everything" ticket please 😏 cineplex employee: ok here you go sir me: [goes to every movie currently playing] cineplex employee: fuhhhhhh! me: should've read the fine print bitchezzzzz 😛
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they have taken my idea
Polymarket
@PolymarketOct 21
JUST IN: McDonald's announces its first-ever reservation-only "fine dining experience" in New York City on October 29.
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Fingers is kinda like hand teeth. Grabbing = chomping
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Me: now, do you understand why it’s funny when Steve-O is covered in diarrhea inside the porta potty? Elizabeth Holmes: well a porta potty shouldn’t be in the air like that.
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announcer 1: you're talking about a guy who doesn't just hate to lose , he also loves to win announcer 2: that's a rare combination
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I hope that This is okay with everyone.
days@DayscdOct 21
I just put my tweet in the oven
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