Fuck romance, I want a burrito.
Costa Mesa, CA
Joined June 2011
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Words I wish people would stop using:
-Zeitgeist
-Gentrify
-I don't want to date you
-You might have a drinking problem
-Moist
Respect to my Lyft driver for not saying a single word to me for the entire 45 minutes of my trip. A true hero.
The good news about being an adult is literally no one can stop you from drinking alcohol for breakfast, but the bad news about being an adult is literally no one can stop you from drinking alcohol for breakfast.
There’s a special place in hell for a woman who looks you in the eye on her way out of the public bathroom and doesn’t tell you that’s it’s out of toilet paper.
Captain Morgan retweeted
someone: “how’s it going?”
me: “i’m doing pretty well in pokemongo”
someone: “no like in life”
me: “my pokedex is really coming along beautifully”
YOU ARE TRIVIALIZING ONE OF THE MOST EMOTIONAL RELATIONSHIPS OF ALL TIME teapaw.org/erinadarling/status/97…
A true hero. 🙌🏻 teapaw.org/cantseawright/status/9…
When your favorite guests @saintpiercing and @MorganJ7 come in to say hi and buy a #NintendoSwitch you know it's gonna be a good day. ❤u2!
When you're looking for a picture in your text details with your boyfriend and every 5th picture is of his poo 🙄
Do you ever get mad when you're watching a TV show and the main character has a baby and goes and names it something lame like Frannie
