Philis (@Philismorah) header
Philis (@Philismorah) profile picture

Philis

@Philismorah

Moon child 🌙

Joined August 2026
  • Tweets1.5K
  • Following78
  • Followers55
3Media
Photo by Philis (@Philismorah)Photo by Philis (@Philismorah)
Growing up means realising you were loved for what you did, not who you were. And then deciding you’re done with that.
Nora (@nora_mindnotes) profile pictureNora@nora_mindnotes18h
It's a painful realization when you discover that being needed and being loved aren't always the same thing. Sometimes growing up means finding out which one you've been experiencing and adjusting accordingly.
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It’s giving “I thought I was chosen but I was just convenient.” Took me way too long to see it.
Nora (@nora_mindnotes) profile pictureNora@nora_mindnotes18h
It's a painful realization when you discover that being needed and being loved aren't always the same thing. Sometimes growing up means finding out which one you've been experiencing and adjusting accordingly.
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Some people will call you when they’re in crisis and disappear the second things calm down. Learning that was brutal.
Nora (@nora_mindnotes) profile pictureNora@nora_mindnotes18h
It's a painful realization when you discover that being needed and being loved aren't always the same thing. Sometimes growing up means finding out which one you've been experiencing and adjusting accordingly.
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Philis retweeted
Auma (@Aumachloe4) profile picture
Auma@Aumachloe417h
This one landed hard. I spent years thinking I was loved because everyone came to me with their problems. Turns out I was just reliable.
Nora (@nora_mindnotes) profile pictureNora@nora_mindnotes18h
It's a painful realization when you discover that being needed and being loved aren't always the same thing. Sometimes growing up means finding out which one you've been experiencing and adjusting accordingly.
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Philis retweeted
Awuor (@Awuorsara100) profile picture
Awuor@Awuorsara10017h
Growing up really is realising you were the emotional support person and not the person they actually wanted around. Still processing that one.
Nora (@nora_mindnotes) profile pictureNora@nora_mindnotes18h
It's a painful realization when you discover that being needed and being loved aren't always the same thing. Sometimes growing up means finding out which one you've been experiencing and adjusting accordingly.
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Philis retweeted
Wahu (@Ngigiwah) profile picture
Wahu@Ngigiwah17h
Lowkey still recovering from finding out how many people only liked me when I was useful. This post said it too cleanly.
Nora (@nora_mindnotes) profile pictureNora@nora_mindnotes18h
It's a painful realization when you discover that being needed and being loved aren't always the same thing. Sometimes growing up means finding out which one you've been experiencing and adjusting accordingly.
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Sco (@stickerscola) profile picture
Sco@stickerscola17h
I used to pride myself on being the strong one. Now I just feel like I trained people to only see me when they needed something.
Nora (@nora_mindnotes) profile pictureNora@nora_mindnotes18h
It's a painful realization when you discover that being needed and being loved aren't always the same thing. Sometimes growing up means finding out which one you've been experiencing and adjusting accordingly.
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Philis retweeted
Bella (@Bellaahiambo) profile picture
Bella@Bellaahiambo17h
Real talk: some of the loneliest years of my life were the ones where I was needed the most. I just didn’t know the difference yet.
Nora (@nora_mindnotes) profile pictureNora@nora_mindnotes18h
It's a painful realization when you discover that being needed and being loved aren't always the same thing. Sometimes growing up means finding out which one you've been experiencing and adjusting accordingly.
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Philis retweeted
Fiona (@Fiona_awuor) profile picture
Fiona@Fiona_awuor17h
This is why I started saying no more. I needed to find out who would still be there when I wasn’t fixing anything.
Nora (@nora_mindnotes) profile pictureNora@nora_mindnotes18h
It's a painful realization when you discover that being needed and being loved aren't always the same thing. Sometimes growing up means finding out which one you've been experiencing and adjusting accordingly.
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June (@Juneotieno_) profile picture
June@Juneotieno_17h
The moment you stop over-functioning and watch who actually stays… that’s the real plot twist. Still not over it.
Nora (@nora_mindnotes) profile pictureNora@nora_mindnotes18h
It's a painful realization when you discover that being needed and being loved aren't always the same thing. Sometimes growing up means finding out which one you've been experiencing and adjusting accordingly.
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Flo (@apiyoflo) profile picture
Flo@apiyoflo17h
Fr, being needed gives you a role. Being loved gives you a place. I spent years in the role and called it love.
Nora (@nora_mindnotes) profile pictureNora@nora_mindnotes18h
It's a painful realization when you discover that being needed and being loved aren't always the same thing. Sometimes growing up means finding out which one you've been experiencing and adjusting accordingly.
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This is the realisation that made me stop auditioning in relationships. I got tired of earning my spot.
Nora (@nora_mindnotes) profile pictureNora@nora_mindnotes18h
It's a painful realization when you discover that being needed and being loved aren't always the same thing. Sometimes growing up means finding out which one you've been experiencing and adjusting accordingly.
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Philis retweeted
Amondi (@Amondi_y) profile picture
Amondi@Amondi_y18h
Some of us built our entire sense of worth on being needed. Finding out it wasn’t the same as being loved still stings, tho.
Nora (@nora_mindnotes) profile pictureNora@nora_mindnotes18h
It's a painful realization when you discover that being needed and being loved aren't always the same thing. Sometimes growing up means finding out which one you've been experiencing and adjusting accordingly.
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The painful part is how long you can go without noticing the difference. Being needed felt so close to being loved that I didn’t question it for years.
Nora (@nora_mindnotes) profile pictureNora@nora_mindnotes18h
It's a painful realization when you discover that being needed and being loved aren't always the same thing. Sometimes growing up means finding out which one you've been experiencing and adjusting accordingly.
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Philis retweeted
Nora (@nora_mindnotes) profile picture
Nora@nora_mindnotes18h
It's a painful realization when you discover that being needed and being loved aren't always the same thing. Sometimes growing up means finding out which one you've been experiencing and adjusting accordingly.
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Nora (@nora_mindnotes) profile picture
Nora@nora_mindnotesNov 6
Replying to @raphaelamek
That “you’ve changed” usually just means “you stopped being easy for me.” The fact that you can say it out loud now already shows how far you’ve come.
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Nora (@nora_mindnotes) profile picture
Nora@nora_mindnotesNov 6
Replying to @yuri_xys
This one landed. Some people didn’t love you rather they loved the absence of friction. Honesty exposes that fast.
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Nora (@nora_mindnotes) profile picture
Nora@nora_mindnotesNov 6
Replying to @Amondi_y
The “cold” label is so telling. It’s rarely about temperature; it’s about the sudden presence of boundaries they never had to navigate before.
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Philis retweeted
Nora (@nora_mindnotes) profile picture
Nora@nora_mindnotesNov 6
Replying to @GilianAdhiambo
That low-grade ache is the part people underestimate. It doesn’t demand attention, so you end up carrying it alone while everyone else assumes you’re fine because you look composed.
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Nora (@nora_mindnotes) profile picture
Nora@nora_mindnotesNov 6
Replying to @nigerianpapi_ng
Exactly. The ones who stay after you’ve stopped shrinking are the ones who actually wanted you, not just the convenience of you.
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