Poodinese lose dismally at home. Anyone who cares sloped off into the night long before the end. Players look like they’d rather be absolutely anywhere else. lolz

We’ve got literally no money, but have signed a player who will never play on very decent wages, and a sixth goalie to act as cheerleader.

This is 100% accurate: Antonio occasionally joins training when not doing fitness alone. He is a million miles away from first team consideration. He does nothing with what remains of the youth set-up, despite coaching being suggested as one of the reasons for signing him.