Sam Strake

Santa won't be here for another 4 months- these will make it till then, right? Right?

@DaveOshry your beef with Dane Cook made it into the Google ai robot

The biblical name for these is Chomp Cheese. All others are false prophets.

Spine Doctor: Are you sexually active? Me: Not really. Doctor: Oh... will you be soon? Me: Probably not. Doctor: I see. I'll go print the "Back stretches for people who understand the ending of Evangelion" list then.

I'm like 90% sure Nicholas Hoult auditions for the lead role in every movie he's in, then the directors make him sit and watch every other actor's audition before casting him as the cuck.

I would get recognized in public, for the first time ever- after spending all last week at the largest nerd convention in the world, at the fucking Weird Al concert lmao

But they were all of them deceived, for another energy drink was made. In the land of Boca Raton, Florida, the Dark Lord Celcius forged in secret a Fifth Loko, to control all others. And into this drink he poured his cruelty, his malice, and High Noon Vodka.

We're just Kens (and a Barbie!)

Last day as Mojo Dojo Casa House Ken at Comic Con 🕶️ Mostly because I'm sore from walking around all day 20% flexing