Greetings from the Umbrella Corporation, Our business is life itself. Thus, we have joined to survey our customer base. All official announcements for the Umbrella Corporation and our branches will be posted to this account. Your continued patronage is much appreciated.

Heyyyyy... Heyyyyyy.........

Before I get the tattoo, has the Umbrella Corporation done anything controversial.

7 minutes.

Forgot to post. I'm getting lashings.

OMG shut up.

Birkin did this when we questioned him on his progress with G.

Stop tagging me in AI bullshit.

Another escape.

False alarm. T Virus.

You would think this doesn't need to be said, but I can name like 5 people who got terminated this week for this.

If you're reading this, you probably have G-Virus.

New T-shirt idea.

It escaped.

Peggle on the work computer, completely ignoring my coworker banging on the glass for help.

Wait, maybe we shouldn't have given sharks the virus.

@ Chris @ Leon

Ordering apple pie from the cafeteria and going home with the worst case of food poisoning you've ever seen.

Leave us and our shrimp poppers alone, thank you.

The guy who mops up bloody puddles for us has died in a freak bloody puddle incident.