Sam Bray

Ken librarians acting as if they’re part of a security firm

Buzzing with this today! Up the sticky 🤝

Shoutout to the couple that found my wallet in town and drove all the way to my house to deliver it! Really are some good people out there☺️☺️

@GWRHelp I’m supposed to be getting a train from Filton abbey wood to Bournemouth today, would it be safer to travel today or tomorrow morning?

Glad ur coming up to Bristol for me tho mate xxxx

Nothing better than pints flying everywhere #FootballsComingHome

Is it acceptable to put the World Cup one whilst at a meal with your girlfriend?

Isco is on a different level of class

When ur car makes a clunking noise and u think ur engine is fucked, but to find it was a football pump underneath a bit in the boot, never felt so relived in my life

Why are girls so moody until you bring them food

The ‘Clean your teeth 5 mins before you go to the dentist because you’re shitting it’ worked well for me today

Help settle my argument with @katiee_steer

Just feels like the norm to wake up on a Saturday morning and football to be cancelled again

Nothing worse than accidentally opening an Arsenal Fan Tv video on Facebook full volume in a silent lecture

When u don’t get ID’d in ASDA for alcohol, but get ID’d in Sainsbury’s for cold and flu relief

You know it’s valentines day tomorrow when there’s a bunch of blokes (including me) scattering round Asda fucking clueless looking for flowers

“All the writing is in cardish” think you mean Welsh babes

Shoutout to @alana_marks and her new boyfriend, congratulations

Half the people on the road haven’t got a clue how to drive like how did u pass ur test mate

Never ask your gf if you can pay less than she pays for added baggage for a flight bc she has more stuff