I used to reply “would” to pictures of hot women implying I would find the idea of sex with them agreeable. As my confidence increased I started to reply “will”. Now I’ve reached a level of self actualization where I simply reply “am”.

women can smell your deficient moral character

I love rubbing alcohol. I love mouthwash that stings. When a cleansing agent causes me pain, I feel a strange comforting reassurance that the pain is its seal of authenticity and proof of a job completed.