Dean (@dakarrier) header
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https://teapaw.org/t.co/m0w4L5YnL5

🇦🇺
Joined July 2019
Photo by Dean (@dakarrier)Photo by Dean (@dakarrier)
I will die on this hill by saying Twitter was better when it was a 140 character limited joke community, instead of the current engagement farming / Facebook type updates.
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I’m late to the game but going to share my Japan pics on Snapchat. Send me your handles if you’d like to see
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A quick update on today’s travel.
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I love when corporate executives brag about their commitment to racial diversity. Mostly because watching them sweat through a sensitivity seminar makes it so much easier to fire them for cause.
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I’m eating an open-faced chicken sandwich on fresh bread with garden tomatoes that I didn’t have to make because I’ve been dealing with hip pain all day. More men like this, please.
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Closest I’ve been to weed is following 420 on twitter.
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It’s been a while, but to those in the dog world, my lovely Lola passed yesterday. After an ACL reconstruction, late onset blindness and diabetes. It was time. I am totally shattered.
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Blockbuster wasn’t just a video store. It was a sacred weekend pilgrimage. Kids today will never know the struggle of VHS fines
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Marriage is mostly just texting ‘do we need anything from the store?’ to the person you just had a full conversation with 5 minutes ago
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Me: [as a ghost, watching chalk line being drawn around my body after being murdered] that is mostly water retention
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I received a bank alert text for suspicious activity. I was buying fruit.
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Who called them ex-girlfriends and not yesterbaes.
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Ran a half marathon? Big Deal! I ate a whole pizza. Finish what you start
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Me: I'm going to sleep Brain: I don’t think so Me: Fine, I'll stay awake Body: this isn’t how it works
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I assume the hardest part of being in a gang is staying out past 8:30 pm.
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Started a band called "Duvet". We only play covers
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