Martin Evans (@hellpants) header
Martin Evans (@hellpants) profile picture

Martin Evans

@hellpants

Filth monger. Jazz verbalist. Plus-sized hand model. Amateur sailor. Professional tit. I’ve smelt an Orcas breath.

 Brighton
hellpants.com
Joined February 2009
  • Tweets54.7K
  • Following1.3K
  • Followers7.8K
3.3KMedia
Photo by Martin Evans (@hellpants)Photo by Martin Evans (@hellpants)Photo by Martin Evans (@hellpants)Photo by Martin Evans (@hellpants)Photo by Martin Evans (@hellpants)Photo by Martin Evans (@hellpants)Photo by Martin Evans (@hellpants)Photo by Martin Evans (@hellpants)Photo by Martin Evans (@hellpants)Photo by Martin Evans (@hellpants)
Because it's Rapture Day again, here's a classic scene from Six Feet Under...
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We no longer require April Fools Day. Every day on the internet is a confusing ordeal of bollocks and mistruths and life is now one giant shitpost so let's just calm down and go have a nap or something.
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Today I participated in the launch of two WasteShark aquadrones made in the Netherlands 🇳🇱 make their Canadian 🇨🇦 debut in the Toronto Harbour. 🌊 These two WasteSharks named Ebb and Flow will work to remove plastic from the surface of the water.♻️
Image from David Piccini (@DavidPiccini)
Image from David Piccini (@DavidPiccini)
Image from David Piccini (@DavidPiccini)
Image from David Piccini (@DavidPiccini)
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‘CUT YOU OFF’ IS OFFICIALLY OUT NOW! I wrote this with mintsauce in a whirlwind of realising some people really don’t deserve your time or attention. I hope people listen to it and feel fucking invincible and untouchable. Meet ‘Little Girl Gone’s hot sequel ✂️
Image from CHINCHILLA (@ChinchillaMusic)
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Humanism in a nutshell! ❤️
Image from Humanists UK (@Humanists_UK)
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What is a humanist? Well, it's this!
A humanist is a person who recognises this life is the only life we know we have, and therefore, resolves to live a moral and fulfilling life in the here and now, based on the inherent human capacity for compassion, and a desire to do good on its own merit. Being a humanist is simply a way of thinking and living that emphasises humanity's capacity and responsibility to promote human flourishing across all forntiers, to protect the natural world, and to work towards a more tolerance society, where rational thinking and kindness previal.

ALT A humanist is a person who recognises this life is the only life we know we have, and therefore, resolves to live a moral and fulfilling life in the here and now, based on the inherent human capacity for compassion, and a desire to do good on its own merit. Being a humanist is simply a way of thinking and living that emphasises humanity's capacity and responsibility to promote human flourishing across all forntiers, to protect the natural world, and to work towards a more tolerance society, where rational thinking and kindness previal.

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Fun fact: Brandon Flowers is teetotal. Making him the only person in the UK to ever sing Mr Brightside sober #Glastonbury
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Image from Justin🦩Boldaji (@justinboldaji)
CNN (@CNN) profile pictureCNN
@CNN14 Jun 2023
After five months of competition, the crews of the round-the-world Ocean Race are getting set for the seventh and final leg of this year's challenge
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Martin Evans retweeted
Satan (@s8n) profile picture
Satan
@s8n7 Jun 2023
Image from Satan (@s8n)
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Farewell, Barry Humphries, you Comedy genius.
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Martin Evans retweeted
Kernow Life (@Kernow_Life) profile picture
Kernow Life
@Kernow_Life12 Apr 2023
#StormNoa Quick visit to #CapeCornwall near to @CapeCornwallCW at 10.44 hrs . Some big storm breakers rolling into the #Coastline . The people down by the cliff wall look tiny against the background . Absolutely fabulous but highly dangerous. @BBCSpotlight @MetMattTaylor @ben_rich @StormHour @StormHourMedia @stivesurfschool @wsl @RNLI @penleelifeboat @LifeboatDaySS @KWTWeather @bbcweather @BBCWthrWatchers @_chrisfawkes – at Perran Downs, England
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Lineker vs Braverman. #ImWithGary on this one.
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“Forget about fucking money, we’re here to help you.”
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Jonnie Baker (@MrJonnieB) profile picture
Jonnie Baker@MrJonnieB27 Feb 2023
Where’s your fucking ‘booky wook’ now, you clattering fanny?
Image from Jonnie Baker (@MrJonnieB)
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Mr_Cameron (@MrCamerun) profile picture
Mr_Cameron@MrCamerun16 Feb 2023
Replying to @Jacob_Rees_Mogg
@Jacob_Rees_Mogg What say you Jake ? #BrexitDisaster #ToryBrexitDisaster #TorySleaze
Image from Mr_Cameron (@MrCamerun)
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'There is no fundamental difference between men and women's brains.' Men: teapaw.org/MenHappier/status/1625…
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How important is context to you? Genuinely want to know if reading the full excerpt (below) on Prince Harry’s time in Afghanistan changes your opinion?
Image from Alex Beresford (@alexberesfordTV)
Image from Alex Beresford (@alexberesfordTV)
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Horrible news. Not hyperbole to state that without Stephan Bonnar’s contributions on TUF 1 (and the finale) the sport isn’t what it is today. He will forever be an extremely important part of MMA history. May he rest in peace.
UFC (@ufc) profile pictureUFC
@ufc24 Dec 2022
The UFC family is saddened by the passing of UFC Hall of Famer Stephan Bonnar. We send our sincerest condolences to his family and friends.

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michael (@bisping) profile picture
michael
@bisping24 Dec 2022
If you pose with a cigar In your mouth (like a lot of dickheads do these days)and think you look badass blowing out the smoke. You’re wrong. You look like a fool.
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Variety (@Variety) profile picture
Variety
@Variety24 Oct 2022
Sunu Gonera, co-creator and executive producer of AMC’s upcoming series “Parish,” has been removed from the project following an internal investigation into “very serious allegations” against him. bit.ly/3VSuLbv
‘Parish’ Co-Creator Sunu Gonera Out From AMC Series Following ‘Serious Allegations’

‘Parish’ Co-Creator Sunu Gonera Out From AMC Series Following ‘Serious Allegations’

AMC has removed Sunu Gonera from 'Parish,' which he co-created and executive produces, following an investigation into 'very serious' allegations against him.

variety.com
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